This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Husband goes to a police station, says ‘My wife is missing!’

Husband goes to a police station...
“My wife is missing! She went out yesterday and has not come home...”

Sergeant at Police Station:
“What is her height?”

Husband:
“Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall

Sergeant:
“Weight?”

Husband:
“Don't know. N...

No-sense Sensor

A military base commander called to complain that the weather-forecasting software our company created for them kept reporting unexplainable wind shifts.

“Do you know where the sensor is located?” my coworker asked.

“Of course,” he responded. “It’s where we park the helicopters.”

[Long] Theodore was once a wild horse, happily roaming amongst the sagebrush of Nye County, NV. But he wandered into Area 51 one day.

After the sensors detected his presence, Theodore was captured by scientists and used for experiments. One day, through a highly unethical and bleeding-edge process utilizing CRISPR, he was transformed into a human male.

Not everything carried over well between life as a horse and life as a ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

You know why those automatic sensor sinks save water?

Because none of them fucking work

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The French fencer

There once was a famous French fencer. He learned how to fence at a young age and honed his skills over time, his prowess with the foil unmatched in all of France. After defeating all French contenders, he moved on to defeat fencers in nearby countries, eventually becoming the best in Europe. As his...

A knock knock joke for automotive savvy people

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Sensor.

Sensor who?

P0325

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A 96 year old goes for a physical checkup...

A 96 year old man goes for a physical checkup with his family doctor.

Once he is finished, the doctor looks at the old man and tells him, "Well Alfred, as far as anyone is concerned, you're in top physical shape. You are as healthy as a 50 year old."

"That's great to hear, I feel grea...

Intelligent life forms

Why is it that when man searches for intelligent life forms they direct the sensors away from the earth?

A mechanical engineer, an electronics engineer and a software engineer where testing a new automobile..

Going down a hill the brakes started to fail. They careened down the hill at speed, screeching round the corners, narrowly missing cliff faces and sheer drops, and finally coming to a halt by steering up a grassy bank.



"Phew, that was close", said the electronics engineer, "I've got a...

What is Apple's greatest fear about China?

That they stop their sensor ships.

Why is Wii the most adult console?

Because it has a sensor bar.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So a man is at a fancy restaurant, and he needs to use the bathroom...

...so he pulls the waiter aside and asks to use the bathroom.

"I am sorry, sir," the waiter replied, "but the Men's bathroom is currently unavailable due to plumbing issues. We're working to fix these now."

The man's face turned to one of desperation. "What about the ladies' restroom?"...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.