I told my boss that three different companies were after me, and I needed a raise to stay at my current job.

"Do you mind me asking which companies?", he said.

"Sure," I said. "Gas, Electric, and Cable".

Why are prosthetic companies the best?

Because they are always willing to lend a hand

Beer companies

3 CEOs from 3 beer companies, namely Budweiser, Castle and Heineken, are attending a conference where each of them has to give a speech. Before they start all 3 are sitting in the waiting area and an attendant comes and asks them what they would like to drink while they are on stage.

The CEO ...

Savvy investors know that this is the time of year to invest in companies that sell supplies for school-goers.

This year, look out for companies like Colt, Smith & Wesson, and Ruger!

Why is parking at game companies such an issue?

They have loading zones only.

Dublin’s Patrick O’Shea called his lawyer and asked, “Is it true they are suin’ dem der cigarette companies for causin’ people to git cancer?”

“Yes, Patrick, sure is true,” responded the lawyer.

“And now someone is suin’ dem fast food restaurants for makin’ dem fat an’ cloggin’ their arteries with all dem der burgers an’ fries, is that true,?”

“Sure is, Patrick.”

“And that a lady sued McDonald’s for millions when sh...

Did you hear about the two stoners who merged their companies?

It was a joint venture

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why does Trump want his Viagra from American pharmaceutical companies?

He doesn't want foreign countries interfering in the next erection

I’m pleased to announce reddit has achieved its goal in becoming one of the top 10 green companies in the world.

The front page is now made up of over 90% recycled content.

Never invest in Waste Management companies

All of those companies are trash

I just don’t know how shoe companies stay in business

Although, it probably helps being the sole supplier

Did you hear cheese companies stopped packaging pre shredded cheese in the USA?

We need to Make America Grate Again

What do Snack companies and Hiking Stores have in common?

They both sell you air.

What do edgy teenagers and energy companies have in common?

They both want more Jules.

The CEOs of four beer companies are having a meeting and decide to place an order. (Not the ending you'd expect)

The CEO of Budweiser orders a Bud light. The CEO of Miller orders a Miller Lite. The CEO of Coors orders a Coors Light. The CEO of Guinness orders coke.

The three CEOs then ask him, why aren't you ordering a Guinness?

He replies: "If you guys aren't drinking beer then I might as well s...

Why do fence repair companies get bad ratings on Reddit?

Because they're only doing reposts.

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