Ana will be barred from the fruit market

Ban Ana

Media : Ben Affleck and Ana de Armas broke up after nearly a year together.

Me : BenAna Split

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An Italian’s Tale

I’ma come here to a hotel. I go down to eat soma breakfast. I tella the waiter I wanna two piss toast. He bringa me only onea piss. I tella him I wanna two piss--he say, “Go to the toilet.” I say, “You no unnerstan’. I wanna two piss ona my plate.” He say, “You better no piss ona da plate you sonna ...

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Having sex with my girl Lana, flipped her backwards

Ended up with anaL

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An Artist in Japan

An English Manga artist is offered a job in Japan - by Studio Ghibli. He arrives in Tokyo 7 hours early, so decides to visit the red light district. Here he bangs a geisha for 5 hours solid - with her screaming "Machigatta ana Machigatta ana" at the top of her voice. Which puts a big smile on his fa...

I have a Russian friend who's a sound technician

And a Czech one too. And a Czech one too.

Christian Horse

A Christian guy named Bill saw ana d online for a Christian Horse, so he went to check it out. The horse's owner said, "It's easy to ride him. Just say 'Praise the Lord!' to make him go and 'Amen!' to make him stop."

Bill got on the horse and said, "Praise the Lord!" Sure enough, the horse ...

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[NSFW] A American businessman takes a trip to Japan

An American businessman travels to Japan for a very important business meeting that will make or break his career. He realizes that sealing the deal for their business will not happen in the board room and so he agrees to join them afterwards for a night out on the town.

After a night of dri...

How do you pronounce "banana split"?

Ban-ana

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A man goes to Japan for a business trip

The night before he meets a very important executive he's extremely nervous. So he hires a prostitute to help him relieve some stress. As they're having sex in his room, she moving around a lot and keeps yelling "machigata ana!" The man doesn't know what this means, but he figures that she's enjoyin...

How does a drummer call his twin daughters?

Ana one, Ana two...

what's it called when a mafia boss named Ana Conda sends his snobbish criminal henchman to go on a mission that includes said henchman going down multiple flights of stairs?

Conda sending condecending con decending

[All credit to Ana Kasparian from the TYT Network] So, I heard Kim Kardashian is having Kanye West's baby...

At least she let him finish.

Short chemistry joke

A chemist bumped into an old friend while out for a walk with her baby.


Chemist: wow, it's been so long! This is my daughter benzene-a.



Friend: Benzene-a?



Chemist: Well we were considering calling her cyclohex-ana, but we thought benzene-a had a nicer ring to...

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Trump goes to Japan...

One day Donald Trump goes to Japan for a diplomatic meeting. On the night of his arrival, he decides to hire a young Japanese prostitute and take her back to his hotel. The girl does not speak any English, but that doesn't stop things from getting hot 'n heavy in the Presidential Suite. Their pas...

Two men are walking through the forest

And they stumble across a deep hole in the ground. They think wow that's a really deep hole. One of them says "I wonder how deep that hole is" . The other guy says "I took AP physics in high school I know what we can do. Let's find something heavy and drop it into the hole. Then, we listen to see ho...

Fred's honeymoon

Frederico's Honeymoon - Fred for the intimate!

At the age of 82, Frederico married Ana, 27, who, in consideration of her elderly husband, decides that they should sleep in separate rooms.

After the wedding party is over, everyone goes to their room.

Ana prepares to go to bed, wh...

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A sales man once went to Japan for business

A sales man once wemt to japan for business. He decided to visit a bordello because he got word of the japanese special capabilities in the love making area. So he went into a room with a lady and they got into the stuff, and in the heat of the moment the lady kept shouting
Machigatta ana,
M...

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[NSFW] An American business man travels to Japan for work

On his first night there, he decides to get a prostitute. They're going at it pretty good when she starts exclaiming "Machigatta ana! Machigatta ana!"

He doesn't understand the language but assuming it must mean "great job!"

Fast forward to the next day, when he's golfing with his Japa...

Why did the characters from Fifty Shades of Grey get into a fight about fast food?

They couldn't agree where to go. Christian wanted Domino's, but Ana insisted on Subway!

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An American businessman is entertaining some overseas business guests on the golf course.

The first guest, who is from Italy, tees off and hits a good shot 200 yards down the fairway. As the American businessman knows a small amount of Italian he says: “Buon tiro”, which means “Good shot”. The Italian businessman replies: “Grazie”.
The second guest, who is from France, tees off and hi...

A time machine goes to the hospital.

The doctor enters and goes to 2017. He finds a caveman inside and returns to the present day.

The doctor says, "Sorry sir, but you have an ana-chronic disease."

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Businessman in Japan

So an American businessman had a trip to Japan where he was to have a meeting with Japanese company CEO.

So when he arrived to Tokyo, he decided to hire a local prostitute to blow some steam off the night before the meeting. As they were doing it, he noticed she constantly screamed ''Machigat...

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An American went on a business trip to Japan.

An American went on a business trip to Japan. He arrives with a few free days to spare and so decides to go out for a few drinks. While out he meets a local and although they do not speak the same language they both feel an instant connection and head home to spend the night together. As soon as ...

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John goes on a business trip to Japan

On the first night upon arrival, he found a brothel and spent the night fucking a prostitute who kept yelling "Machigatta ana! Machigatta ana!" during sex. Since he didn't understand a word of Japanese, John assumed it meant approval and kept going.

The next day he played golf with several J...

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An American man travels to Japan on business...

...and on his first night he visits a bar in Tokyo to experience the local nightlife. He meets an enchanting woman, and after several rounds of drinks and flirting, she accompanies him back to his hotel. They commence copulation, and in the throws of passion, the woman screams out "Machigatta ana! M...

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I am annoyed that my wife came up with a girls name for my penis

I don't even know who Ana Conda is!

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A man on his death bed:

"Honey, are you here?"
"Yes darling"
"Ana, are you here?"
"I'm here daddy"
"John, are you here too?"
"Of course daddy"
"Then who's in the fucking shop??"

A filipino joke i found and translated it.

John: Dad, there's a girl i like. She's beautiful. I want to go out with her.

Dad: Who?

John: The girl across our street, Nina.

Dad: Oh no, you can't. Don't tell Mom but she's your sister.



John was furious, but a week has passed and he fell in love again.

...

What’s a skeletons favorite fruit?

A bone-ana

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A business man goes to Japan...

To meet some potential clients and play a round of golf with them. The night before his meeting the man decides to pick up a Japanese hooker. He brings her back to his hotel and they start going at it. While they were doing their thing the hooker, being able to speak only Japanese, starts moaning, "...

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A man is on a business trip in Japan

On his first night, he decides he wants to hire a prostitute, so he goes out and finds the best he can, with his limited Japanese.

He brings her back to his hotel room, and the entire time the two of them are going at it, she is screaming "Ana ga chigau! Ana ga chigau!" He, of course, couldn'...

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A businessman arrives in Japan and decides to get an escort for the night.

He turns off the light and proceeds to caress her. When he finally penetrates her she says 'machigatta ana'. He thinks nothing of it and starts banging her harder. She then starts screaming 'machigatta ana, machigatta ana'. He thinks to himself 'boy, she must really like it'. When he finishes she is...

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Man goes on a work trip to Japan.

A man travels to Japan for work. After a few weeks he gets lonely and hires a prostitute. They get down to business, but right away she starts yelling "machigatta ana! Machigatta ana!"

Not speaking a word of Japanese he thinks she must be really enjoying it. He finishes up and she collects h...

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A business man goes to Japan

A business man had an important meeting to attend in Japan.
He arrives relatively early the night before the meeting so he figures he will take the opportunity to hire a hooker for the evening.
He heads out, finds a girl and brings her back to his hotel.
While he is giving it to her, chan...

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Some Japanese business men take out an American exec out on the town...

to show him a great time. They hit a bunch of restaurants and eventually settle at a local bar and drink heavily. As the night is coming to an end, the Japanese men think it would be hilarious if they send the American man home with a Japanese hooker. In a drunk state, he agrees and is sent to his h...

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So, a man goes on a business trip..

To Japan, he gets there during the night and is pretty nervous about the business meeting so he decides to order up a prostitute, a fine lady walks into his room and they make love for hours, the entire time she is going wild, taking it from behind and screaming "Machigatta ana" after he finishes he...

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In his first trip to Japan, the businessman...

...is very nervous about meeting his wealthiest client, Mr. Nakagawa, whom he will be playing golf with the day after he arrives in the country. He takes a cab from the airport to his hotel and heads to the bar to drink his nerves away. Over the course of countless cups of sake, he meets a lovely yo...

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A businessman travels to Japan...[nsfw]

the American businessman arrives a day early for his meeting with his Japanese business colleague and being quite the tourist he decides to hit the the town. He goes to a couple of sushi bars and loosens up a bit, he meets an attractive women at one of the karaoke bars and after quite a while of tr...

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