"How can you watch porn but still claim you love only me?" My wife asked
" The same way I watch Formula 1 whole weekend but still happily drive my 2010 Toyota Camry everyday" I replied..
That satisfied her...
I just failed to mention I take rental at Enterprise when I go on business trips
Cheating husband dies and makes it to the pearly gates.
St Peter looks at him and says "You were unfaithful to your wife 28 times. Don't worry, you'll be accepted in -- only you won't get a brand new car like those who were more loyal in their marriage"
Confused the man asks "I get a car though?"
St Peter replies "Of course. Everyone needs ...
3 men enter the gates of heaven
They are met by Saint Peter who explains in heaven they are given a vehicle. The quality is based on how faithful a partner they've been. The first man receives a brand new Ferrari. He jumps in and takes off. The second man receives a recent model Toyota Camry, somewhat satisfied he jumps in a...
A police officer pulls up to a stop sign
A police officer pulls up to a stop sign with a beaten up Toyota Camry in front of him. The officer comes to a stop and waits, but the Camry refuses to move. The officer waits a minute and begins to get agitated. Finally, the officer gets out of the police car and walks up to the Camry. The window c...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A guy asks a doctor how long he will live
So the doctor, looking at his clipboard and taking notes, begins to ask him a series of questions.
Doc: Do you eat red meat?
Doc: Do you smoke cigarettes, cigars, or a pipe?
Doc: Do you use any illicit drugs?