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Assistants Jokes

Two businessmen meet up and start discussing their assistants.

Two businessmen meet up and start discussing their assistants.

Businessman 1: You know, my assistant is an idiot.

Businessman 2: Oh, you think that's bad? My assistant is the worst! I haven't seen anyone more stupid than him.

Businessman 1: Let's bet on it. Bring your assistant ...

Why did the acupuncturist have so many assistants?

They needle the help they can get!

What do you call assistants that help citrus fruit?

Lemonade.

A zoo owner is busy at his desk when 3 of his assistants walk in, a blonde, brunette, and redhead.

The brunette steps forward and says, “Sir, we’ve finished our work on those new exhibits you wanted”. The man gets up from his desk and follows the three out of the room down to the exhibit hall.

First the brunette stops and turns and points at here exhibit. “Ah, you finished the gorilla cag...

The name of the famous magician that got too handsy with his assistants has been leaked.

David Cop-a-feel.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Jack off...

Two managers are going over their budget for the next year. After analyzing expenses and revenues, they come to the conclusion that they will have to lay off one of their two assistants, Jack or Jane.

They go back and forth but can't decide who to lay off. Finally, one manager decides that th...

Man looking for a job

A man looses his job because he was not seeing how badly he's been at it and got fired.

He decides the next day to go find a job. He goes to a full-service employment center to find his new job. He fills out paperwork with one of the assistants there and is being asked,

"So, what kind...

So a Blonde Brunette and a Redhead are all assistants to a powerful lady C.E.O.....

The C.E.O tells the ladies she is leaving for the day and for them to watch things/do her work while she is out. When the C.E.O. leaves, the Redhead says, "Man this is the 3rd time this week she's done this to us!"
The Brunette starts to gather her things and replies: "that's it, I'm outa here." ...

Once I had completed my final exam, my professor told me to turn it in to one of the teaching assistants.

Good thing I have been practicing my origami.

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