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Arguments Jokes

Why does the baker rarely get into arguments?

He's a loafer, not a fighter.

The argument

So a guy calls the front desk of the hotel he's staying at and says, "I'm in room 858. You need to send someone to my room immediately. I'm having an argument with my wife and she says she's going to jump out the window."

The front clerk says, "I'm sorry sir, but that sounds like a personal i...

I hate getting into arguments about Mobius Strips.

They're always one sided

What do you call a huge, angry, green man that cites all his arguments from peer reviewed journals?

The credible hulk

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

People that can't support their own arguments piss me off...

I don't know why.

Internet arguments are like connect four

but you only have three pieces

What do you call a family member who doesn't support their arguments with evidence?

Just cuz.

(I came up with this just now and I'm so proud of it and I haven't slept in 3 days)

Snow White, a dwarf and Freddy Krueger are having an argument

Snow White says "I'm the most beautiful person in the world! I know it!" The dwarf says "Stop lying, of course you're not! But I'M the shortest person on this earth." Freddy Krueger says "Well, I'm the ugliest person on earth!" Snow white says "Guys, stop arguing! We can just go to the magic mirror ...

The arguments between the "pro-mask" and "anti-mask" groups is really intense! People are even PRACTICING their arguments at home first.

Just yesterday I heard a 14 y/o boy tell his friend that at home he mask debates into a sock!

Six Supreme Court justices, floating face-down in a river

All 6 conservative members of the SCOTUS got stranded in the woods with only a giant suitcase and a couple of paddles. Then they came to a raging river- it was fast-moving, wide and rocky but only waist deep. They began to bicker over how to get across. Kavanaugh, Thomas, and Gorsuch said "We are st...

My wife and I got in a lot of arguments until we agreed there's no right or wrong way of doing things, there's just just her way and...

...the wrong way.

I never get into arguments with ballerinas

they always have a strong point

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

3 good arguments that Jesus was black [long]

There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:
1. He called everyone brother
2. He liked Gospel
3. He didn't get a fair trial

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into His Father's business
2. He lived at home until he was 33 <...

Anti-Vaxxers are immune to logical arguments

too bad for them they aren't immune to everything else

My girlfriend has just told me, she thinks we'd have less arguments if I wasn't so pedantic.

I told her, "I think you mean fewer".

Valid arguments are like anime openings

There’s always a but(t).

Men always have the last word in arguments with their wives

Sorry

What are the two best arguments against democracy?

Donald Trump & Hillary Clinton

Why did Steve Jobs hate arguments with Bill Gates?

He could never WinThose

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