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Apps Jokes

So china is making phones without Google apps now

Guess it was always my way or the huawei

*i'm so sorry, I tried*

Dating apps are so weird

Apparently "must be an animal lover" doesn't mean what you think.

What do dating apps and the 4th of July have in common?

Both really get going just after dark, start with a spark, and end with a bang.

Women on dating apps give me compliments all the time

One time this girl told me "you are unmatched"

Reddit’s new API Costs

Yep that’s it. It’s going to price out all those apps you all use instead of the official one to read or post jokes. And I can tell you first hand, it is much tougher to copy and paste in official app.

Can we go black out on June 12-14?

Told my friend to use multiple dating apps to find a partner because…

… she doesn’t believe in love at first site

Which Disney Princess is always on dating apps?

Tinderella.

Have you played the reddit apps drinking game?

You drink until the page loads. It took me three beers to make this post

A husband and wife are doing a crossword puzzle.

Husband: Programs for mobile devices. 4 letters

Wife: Apps

Husband: Adolescent, 4 letters

Wife: Teen

Husband: Contraction meaning failed to perform, 5 letters

Wife: Didn't

Husband: Take a life, 4 letters

Wife: Kill

Husband: Religious songs, 5 l...

I keep meeting bi women on the apps

Every time I say hello they say Byeee

Girls on dating apps get bombarded with too many lame and boring messages

For them, finding the good ones is like finding a needle in a hey-stack.

Girlfriends are like phone apps

They come with in-app purchases, and need the reassurance of updates to function well.

Which dating apps do priests prefer to use?

Kinder

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

On Tinder and similar apps, girls keep asking me about my height

Are we sure these girls wanna fuck or are they basketball scouts?

She was a gentle custodian of money made from dating apps

A tender tender of Tinder tender

Little known fact #38: One of the first online "hook-up" apps started out using Sean Connery to do their voice overs. They soon noticed they were only getting hits from roofers.

Apparently they were interested in the dozens of hot shingles in their area.

I feel like I only meet people now using hookup apps

the last time I met a guy in real life
I was out drinking

He told me he was a cop

I found that out when he pulled me over

What’s Thanos favorite app

Snapchat

Captain Hook: arrrg I miss Vine. twas me fav'rite app

Smee: but capn! there's a new app! it aint exactly the same, but tis very similar!

Captain Hook: what's it called?

Smee: Umm

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