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Username Jokes

I am selling my username.

It’s just under a buck.

/u/username goes to the grocery store....

username checks out.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How did you come up with your reddit username?

I made mine when I stopped giving a shit

/u/username hates the hotel he is staying in and starts packing his stuff.

Username checks out.

Why did Death come to r/jokes looking for a redditor with the username Oast?

Like everyone here on r/jokes, he came to reap Oast.

Username walks into a hotel...

And asks for a room. A few days later he leaves.

I guess you could say,

Username checks out.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My friends username

Was ßilly ßadass.

I thought it made him look silly and sad.

And yes, I know this joke is groß.

My preferred reddit username is like my preferred partner.

Both are already taken.

How can I change my Reddit username?

I'm finally off the cakepops!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I zipped up my jeans and got my penis caught in the zipper. I painfully shouted out.....

"Username checks out"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My friend always gets discriminated because his username ends with 88

Stay strong, u/KillTheJews88

I saw a Slav who had a fitting username

I told them their username czechs out

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] I took a girl back to my place last night...

...as I was fucking her on my bed, I pulled out a bottle of lube and said, "Do you mind if I put it up your arse?"

She looked at me and said. "Is it going to hurt?"

I said, "Probably, it's a big bottle."


[EDIT]: My top post ever is about sadism! Damn I love Red...

I’ll never get laid with this username because..

I’ll always scare the chicks away....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I made a username called "My Dick" on a website.

The website said that it wasn't long enough.

Liam Neeson's first choice of username was taken

His second choice was taken too

Guy dies and goes to heaven (originally a TikTok: username- saucyray- not my joke)

Guy (g) “wha- where am I?”

Other guy (OG) “in heaven”

G “dang it, gosh I’m so stupid”

OG“so uh, how’d ya die?”

G “I um, had come home to find my wife cheating on me, I got so mad I threw the refrigerator out the window and got caught on it”

OG *pfft*

G ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I thought this was relevant considering my username... Pretty funny joke :)

Guy walks in a bar, sits and gets a beer. He sees a jar filled with 5$ behind the bar. The barman explains the client needs to put 5$ in the jar to know what it's about. The client pays up, the bartender explains the client will get all the money if he can do 3 things successfully. 1-Drink a shot of...

Soon, usernames will be passed in families as a legacy

"Son, there's something i want you to have.., it's my username"
"Oh jees, thanks dad ! "
"You're welcome son, euh i mean SirSpankALot"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was walking down main street and there was a homeless man with a signt hat said “1 dollar for dirty joke.”

Seemed like a good investment to me so I gladly handed over a dollar.

Homeless man: “Alright sir whats your name?

Me: “Username-valid ”

Homeless man: “So username-valid, there is black rooster alright? How many legs does that chicken have”

Me: “two?”

Homeless man: ...

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