Smarty Pants

An Engineer was unemployed for a long time.
He could not find a job so he opened a medical clinic and puts a sign up outside: "Get your treatment for $500, if not treated get back $1,000."

One guy thinks this is a good opportunity to earn $1,000 and goes to his clinic.
-Guy: "I have lo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I have a friend

He's a bit of a smarty pants. He comes to me today and tells me, "you know that an onion is the only food that can make you cry?"


So I shoved a pineapple up his arse.

A farmer bragged to his friend about his smart chickens

"How do you know they're smart?"

"They love classical music! That's smarty-pants music right there."

"And how do you know that's what they like?"

"Every morning, I say to the chickens 'What music for today?' and they ask for their favorite composer: 'Bach, Bach, Bach!'"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Job Profile

The CEO during a site visit to the office asks a young Manager "Yes smarty, What do you do?"

Manager (calmly) : "Sir, I'm the Sexual Advisor to the VP."

Pin drop silence ensues, photographer stops taking pictures, all others stop working and start looking around.

The CEO looks ...

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