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What do you call a man who repairs TVs?

The screensaver

Bill Gates dies and goes to see St Peter

St Peter reviews his life and says to him: "Welcome Mr Gates; you've lived an extraordinary life so we would actually like to offer you the choice between Heaven and Hell"

Bill replies: "What are my options?"

St Peter takes him to two computers. The first is Hell. It's a deserted sandy...

Bill Gates died in a car accident.

He found himself in purgatory being sized up by God.
"Well Bill I'm going to let you decide on where you want to go" says God.
Bill replied, "Well thanks God. What's the difference between the two?" "I'll show you," God replies.
So Bill went to hell. It was a beautiful clean sandy beach wi...

Bill Gates dies and goes to Heaven

St. Peter is waiting for Bill Gates at the pearly gates of heaven

"Well Bill, you're not Christian, but since you've led a good life, I'll let you choose where you end up."

St. Peter shows Bill a video of heaven - people praising god, floating on clouds, etc.

"Eh, that place loo...

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