Sim Jokes

If you get bored, you can just start over with a new family.

Just like my dad.

Core gameplay is getting in bed with the Chinese :>

You got bored and started clicking on all the disasters menu options at the same time

These 3 strings walk into a bar. The first one goes to the bartender and says, "gimme a drink" and the bartender says "I'm sorry but we don't serve strings here."

So the second string thinks that maybe if he asks nice the bartender will give him a drink. So the second string says to the bart... read more

You play as Link, the hero of Thyme.

It's the only time I can watch a family naked and not get arrested.

I hate jet lag.

For example, on the sims, you can have a job and a house

but I didn't tell her that my phone has dual Sim

It's character building

They call it the Sims

Note: this technically a repost

A gentleman with a severe stutter approaches the pastor after Sunday service.

"I-i-i... I-i-id like to v-v-v-v-vol-vol-vo-volunteer to s-s-s-se-sell b-b-b-bi-b-bibles, f-fff-f-f-fa-fa-father..."

"That would be wonderful, my son. We'll start you with one box. Please go door to door thr... read more

It’s several shades of blue, very thin, about 3” long and 2” tall with these little raised numbers and letters on it, it has what looks like a SIM card on one end, a WiFi symbol looking thingy on the front, it has a bunch of tiny words and some additional numbers on the back with a solid black secti... read more

Dev 1: Did you see that? I think the simulation just broke for a second.

Dev 2: I think it's more accurate to say it glitched.

Dev 1: Dude, I'm not about to argue over sim antics.

Then i stopped playing Sims

That’s God playing Sims, he just cancelled your action.

Lamarck notes that the monkey's arms have become long from reaching for bottles on the high shelves. Darwin disagrees, saying that the monkey got the job because it was born with long arms. Jerry Lewis looks at the both of them, and says…

Sorry, SimLife couldn't get a needed punch line.
... read more

We're very SIM Allah.

They call it "The Sims".

You realize The Sims is a financial fantasy game where a 2 story house costs 100 000$ and can be afforded with a working salary

He loads it into his van and takes it to a clock repair shop. In the shop is a little old man who insists he is Swiss but has a heavy German accent asks Harvey, "Vat sims to be ze problem?"

Harvey says, "I'm not sure, but it doesn't go 'tick- tock-tick-tock' anymore. Now it just goes 'tick...... read more

She takes The Sims very seriously.

Mum: No sense, my son is always playing dating sims and he still unable to find a girlfriend.

Hi, yeah I know.

You do? How?

Well you are calling a phone that has no SIM card or battery in it.


^((Translated from Russian, I don't think much is lost by replacing FSB))

They're renaming the game to The Sims 5.

They both let me stick it in only one place.