A joke my grandmother, of all people, told me when I was a kid.
I don't know how many of y'all have heard this joke, but here it goes.
Two guys were at a University of Georgia football game when one of them looks down at the Georgia Bulldog sidelines and sees Uga, the school mascot, licking himself like dogs like to do. The guy smiles, leans over to his b...
Because he can
Clem and Cletus go to a University of Georgia football game and before the game starts the cheerleaders come out with UGA, the real English bulldog mascot. UGA sits on the sideline turf and starts licking his balls. Clem points this out to Cletus and says "I sure wish I could do that" Cletus resp...
Why did the football player cross the field?
To get to the other sideline
A horse plays cricket
I heard this a while ago on BBC America, so it's paraphrased a bit:
A horse is in his field, watching a cricket match over the fence.
He calls out to the captain, and asks if he could play as well. The skipper says, "Why not? Might be fun," and gives the horse a bat as it w...
The Cool Clam Club
Deep beneath the ocean there is an exclusive club known for only having the coolest of clams in their midst. This was called the Cool Clam Club.
Now, the Cool Clam Club was known across the seven seas as one of the most prestigious clubs known to seakind due to the fact that their initia...
A boy breaks his arm and his dad takes him to the hospital.
The son gets a cast and heals up just fine after several weeks. He goes up to his father after he gets his cast off and says, "Dad, I'm healed!"
"Hi Healed, I'm Dad."
The son laughs and thinks his dad is the funniest ever.
A year later, the boy falls on his face and chips a toot...
The Lion and the Elephant
Everybody knows that the lion is the king of the jungle. Always has been, and for generations it seemed like he always would be. One afternoon, however, after a particularly poorly received watering hole decision, the elephant had had enough.
“Lion,” he said, “I’ve been your major domo for a...