This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My therapist tells me to use the term "breather" instead of "timeout" when disciplining my children, it has worked wonders...

"GO TO YOUR ROOM AND TAKE A FUCKING BREATHER!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A boy was told to get the first five letter of the alphabet for school by asking his family

A six-year-old goes to school and his homework was to go ask his family for the first 5 letters of the alphabet. he goes home. he asks his mom who was taking a nap what is the first letter of the alphabet

the mom says "shut up I'm tired" .he makes a not in his mind about it

he then goe...

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Johnny was playing with his train set while mother was in the kitchen doing dishes...

Chigga chigga chigga chigga hoot hoot. "The train has reached the station, all you mother fuckers getting on, get on and all you bastards getting off, get off.

Johnnys mom rushes out and yells at Johnny for his bad language and gives him a 5 min timeout.

6 minutes later she hears ...

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Little Jimmy is playing with his trainset while his mom is in the kitchen.

The trains just chugging along and stops at the first station.
Little Jimmy says “Welcome to station one! Mothafuckas getting off, get off. Mothafuckas stayin on, stay on”
Jimmys mom hears from the kitchen, comes and yells at him, “JIMMY! If I hear you talk like that again you’ll go in timeou...

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Learning to Swear

Two brothers, 7 and 5, decide one evening that they are getting older, and it's time they learned to swear. The older brother says that he will work on "Damn" and the younger brother agrees to refine his usage of "Ass".

The next morning, the brothers come down the stairs and their mother asks...

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Today in elementary school.

Teacher: Next week, we have a field trip to travel to Uranus.

Kid: Myanus?

Teacher: No... You're traveling to timeout for field trip.

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Little Johnny is out flying his plane in the yard...

and he lands it and exclaims in his pilot voice, "All you fucking people that want to get off, get off. All you fucking people that want to get on, get on.
The plane then takes off again, and is making some laps around the yard. Little Johnny then lands the plane next to the kitchen window, which...

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