UPJOKE
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Julius Caesar famously had a quick nap before crossing the Rubicon

the rest is history
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What did Caesar say after crossing the river Rubicon?

"Can someone get me some dry socks?"
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Husband: My wife is missing. She went to rescue people from the flood yesterday and has not come home ...

Sergeant at Police Station:
What is her height?

Husband:
Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.

Sergeant:
Weight?

Husband:
Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.

Sergeant:
Color of eyes?

Husband:
Sort of brown I think. Never really ...
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