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Shoe Size Jokes

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they say penis size is related to shoe size...

that makes the fear of clowns even worse.

**Edit** Ten hours in, this is my highest rated post ever! happy I found a place where im appreciated. ill come back with more material! :D

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A nun decides before she dies she wants to have sex

So she asks a woman for advice, the woman tells her she wants to find a man that has a big dick. The nun says how will I know if a man has a big dick just by looking at him? The woman tells the nun you can tell by the shoe size. The nun searches the city to find the man with the biggest shoes in tow...

What did they say about the couple who had the same shoe size?

They were sole mates

I just read that the world record for shoe size is 37...

That's no small feet!

How do you measure a Lego minifigure's shoe size?

In square feet.

A man had excruciating headaches

So he decided once and for all to go see a specialist to see what can be done.

After extensive scans and tests the doctor calls him in and gives him the bad news.
"I'm very sorry sir, you have a very rare case in which your nuts press up against the base of your spine which, in turn, is ...

If what they say about the size of a man’s package being related to his shoe size is true...

No wonder everybody’s looking for Bigfoot.

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A 6'4'' ninth grader was acting up in class. His teacher looked at him and said, ''Act your age, not your shoe size.''

The boy looks down at his size 14 shoes, then says, ''But they're the same.''

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What was the similarity between jews and shoe sizes?

... There were more in 42 than in 46.

Babe is it in?

W: "Yea."
M: "Does it hurt?"
W: "Uh huh."
M: "Let me put it in slowly."
W: "It still hurts."
M: "Okay, let's try another shoe size."

What did the husband say to his wife when he tried pushing it in as much as he could, but it still wouldn't fit?

He said "I'm going to try on a different shoe size."

Series of jokes translated from Armenian

Some context: Abaran is a city in Armenia, and there's this stereotype about the "Abarantsi" (person from Abaran) who is supposed to be stupid and there's a bunch of jokes about it, kind of like blonde jokes (this is all for the sake of the joke, however, and we love and respect the people of Abaran...

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Pedophile Clown

Inside of an Interrogation room
Investigator: Where were you on the 5th of March?
Clown: I was at a kids birthday party
Investigator: what were you doing at the party?
Clown: I was the Clown
Investigator: what were you doing as the clown?
Clown: Showing them my shoe size
Investi...

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