There's a really obvious way to get people to bruise their shins.

When I tell you what it is, you'll kick yourself.

What do you call a man with no shins?

Tony.

What do you call a man without shins?

Tony.

(A joke created by a non-redditing friend)

A man approaches the gates of heaven

A man approaches the gates of heaven and asks to be allowed to enter.
"Tell me one good thing you did in your life,"says St Peter.
"Well,"says the man,"I saw a group o...

Why does Cotton Hill from "King of the Hill" like to throw rocks?

Because Jesus said, "Let he who is without shins cast the first stone."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Chinese man and a Jewish man are sitting next to each other on a plane

They make polite small talk and then sit back to wait for takeoff.

All of a sudden, the Jewish man turns and delivers his neighbor a swift kick in the shins.

"Yeow!", yells the Chinese man, "What was that for?"

"That was for Pearl Harbor!"

"But the Chinese didn't do that!...

So my Friend Told me That Life is Too Short.

Apparently responding with 'So Life is an angry midget' was uncalled for.

I got kicked in the shins.

By a midget.

Life sucks.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A kid in a tracksuit called to my door last night and said “Trick or treat”

“Its not Halloween till Tuesday. What are you even supposed to be?”

“I’m a ware wolf” he said with a cheeky grin.

“But you’re not even wearing a costume”

“Well it’s not a fucking full moon yet dickhead” he said before kicking me in the shins and running away laughing.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Stupid Dog

A butcher is leaning on the counter toward the close of day when a dog with a basket in its jaws comes pushing through the door. "An' wot's this then? " he asked. The dog knocks the basket sharply into the butcher's shins. "You dumb dog. " As he reaches down to smack the dog, he notices a note and a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Phil dies and is met by the Devil in front of three doors.

The Devil takes him to one side. 'Look, Phil,' he says, 'we're trying something out to cut down on admin down here. We used to assign punishments to the damned that fit their sins, but now we're letting people choose themselves.'

He gestures to the three doors. 'What I can do for you is this:...

How do you tell the teams apart in Amish women's basketball?

It's skirts versus shins.

So Helen Keller walks into a bar . . .

. . . then she walks into a table, she knocks over a lamp, barks her shins on the ottoman, spills a drink . . .

it's fine I'll show myself out.

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