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A writer moves to a rural area so he can focus on his writing without distractions

After getting settled in he sits down to start writing and is immediately disturbed by a knock on the door.

He answers to door to find an old scraggly looking man in dirty overalls, with very few teeth, and a long unkempt beard. The old man looks very excited to see him.


Howdy ne...

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How Texas got its name (If you are from Texas you may not want to read it)

These three cowboys were traveling south and finally crossed the border from Oklahoma into a new territory that was still owned by Mexico. As they sat down to make camp that night one of them looked around as the sun set over the horizon and asked his companions "what should we name this place? I am...

Damn Dirty Hippie

I live near a small store way out in the country close to a hippie commune. They're good people for the most part, although a bit smelly sometimes.

I was in there one day and a long-haired, scraggly looking fellow came in. He had a ten-dollar bill in one hand and was naked as the day he was b...

A man was sitting in a pub

As a man with a swollen eye and bloody nose walks up to the bar and gives the bartender a $50 bill.

Behind the bar he sees the bartender put the $50 bill in a large jar full of money and the man leaves.

He asks the bartender about the jar of money and the bartender says "oh that's th...

A man goes to find a Holy Knight of Trigonometry

His journey started after learning everything he could from his master, but he wanted to test his skills with one of the three knights. A long journey took him across plains, he had to climb dangerous mountains, sail across perilous seas, and even fly over a river of lava, flowing from a volcano tha...

A grandfather takes his grandson hunting for the first time

They are on the look-out when a young deer appears in the middle of the clearing, the little one raises his rifle but his grandfather stops him saying "that one is too young, let's wait a bit more".

They wait, and a magnificent deer in the prime of his years struts into the clearing and the ...

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A guy goes up to the Yukon and wants to hear some old Gold Rush stories....

so he goes into a bar and asks the bartender if he knows any old stories. Bartender says "you best ask old Ned." and indicates towards a man sitting in the corner in a wheelchair.

Old Ned is wizened with a long scraggly beard. He has a comforter across his knees as he nurses his beer.
...

So there were these two roads sitting in a crowded bar...

So there were these two roads sitting in a crowded bar enjoying a hard-earned drink after a tough day of being roads.
They've had a few shots of tarquila each and are beginning to talk tough.

The first road slugs down another shot and says "You know... I reckon I'm the best road in the cou...

[Long] The Genie's Experience. (Taken from r/WritingPrompts but works on r/Jokes)

"And now, for your final experience!" Exclaimed the genie, throwing his arms wide and his chest out. Before him, an elderly man stood, his fingers still clutches around the lamp. And though wrinkles cut into the man's face, and wisps of grey hair danced around his temple, the genie was his senior by...

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A man sits quietly at a bar, having a beer...

... When the doors to the bar fly open and an old, dirty, scraggly bearded man walks in. He looks around the bar until he spots the man at the bar, quietly drinking a beer.

"You!" The old man points at the man at the bar, "I fucked your mother!"

The whole bar takes notice, and looks at...

An Archaeologist Found an Ancient Vase at a Dig Site...

and as he began to inspect the runes carved in it, he started dusting it off, and a genie came screaming out of it in rage.


"**Who disturbs my slumber**! I have been asleep for thousands of years, and *you* dare to wake ***me***? I should kill you where you stand!"

The archaeologis...

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