The fighter take out his knife and points in front of him and replies, "I'll beheading that way."
Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud. The passenger, Bubba, said, "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a po-lice roadblock! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!" "Don't worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish dr...
Drinking and driving.
Drinking and Driving
I would like to share a personal experience with my
friends about drinking and driving. This might save you the cost and
embarrassment of being arrested for DUI.
As you know, people have been known to have
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
2 Belgians are driving through a dark, wooded area
They encounter a roadblock and are stopped by a police officer. The officer looks over the car carefully. He then signals the driver to lower his car window, and says: "good evening, i need you to answer a few questions. You see, we are looking for a pair of serial rapists..". The driver interrupts ...
A guy is driving past the White House....
...and he sees that the road is blocked, but they are letting cars through one at a time. There are crowds on the sidewalk, shouting, but he can't hear what's being said.
Finally he gets to the roadblock, and rolls down his window. "What's going on?" he asks.
"Donald Trump has had ...
Three politicians and little Johnny are walking down the street.
There's a republican, a democrat and a libertarian walking on one side of the street and little Johnny on the other. They come across a horribly dilapidated bridge, looking like it's about to collapse.
"We should raise taxes and have some company fix it. Then everybody will be able to use it ...
I was driving on a highway in Singapore and a random roadblock was spotted there. Prior to driving past, I dropped a drunk friend.
As I drove slowly for my turn to pass, I decided to do this.
Officer: Sir, random check. (Sniffed) sir please park to the side.
Trump and Obama - oldie but goldie
It's time for Obama to step down. As a final duty Obama gives Trump the combination to the office safe and tells him, "There are three envelopes in there labelled "1", "2", and "3". If you end up in trouble, open envelope "1". He says his goodbyes and rides off into the sunset.
A couple of we...
I took a cab home the other night and thankfully everything ended fine!
Over the weekend, I was out drinking with some friends and we ended up finishing off the handful of beers with a couple shots before heading out. (Not a smart move, I know)
I was nervous about taking a cab home, but my friends all insisted it was in my best interest.
Sure enough, I wa...
A tyrant decides to check on the patience of his people, so he decides to play a game... (Modified political joke)
(Just for the record, this joke I believe is from Arabic and is supposed to portray a certain nation, but I've modified it a little)
He tells his advisers to set up a roadblock in the entrance of the capital to see if anyone speaks up. Nobody does.
After a while, he orders his advisers...
Taking a taxi home
One night, a man went out drinking with his friends. After having several drinks, he decided it was time to go home, but he knew that if he were to get pulled over, he would most certainly go to jail; so he decided to take a taxi home, good thing too, for on his way home, he passed through a DUI ...
Bubba n' Buford II
One day Bubba n' Buford were drivin' down the Farm to Market road in their pickup drinkin' Lone Star longnecks n' chillin' out to Bob Wills "San Antonio Rose" n' low n' behold, they come over a hilltop and there's a DPS roadblock a stoppin' folks. Thinkin' quick, Bubba pulls over to the side a the...