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Rico Jokes

If California splits into 3 states, we just need to make Puerto Rico a state.

We’d have a prime number of states and finally be “one nation, indivisible”

What do you need if you're facing a RICO charge?

A "suave" defense! (For those old enough to understand).

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I don't normally see eye to eye with most Trump supporters, but if there's one thing we do agree on...

It's that the president of Puerto Rico is the dumbest son of a bitch to ever hold public office.

Hey, where’s Rico?

At the hospital, he drank a beer yesterday.

A beer? What beer?

Mine.

Some people want Puerto Rico to become the 51st State...

Some people want Puerto Rico to become the 51st State...

I say let's do it, and find two more new states.

Then we'd have 53 states.

A nice PRIME number...

ONE NATION - INDIVISIBLE

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Tropical Storm Karen (2019), briefly affected Puerto Rico before moving out to sea.

Typical Karen move, lots of noise then buggers off in a huff.

So I decided to visit Puerto Rico....

....honestly not impressed, I’d only give them one star.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hi, my name is Rico the Rooster, and I’m a sex addict.

Over the course of 12 months, Farmer Ted saved every penny that he could to purchase the prize winning rooster known as Rico. Little did he know, Rico the rooster was a sexy addict. Farmer Ted returned home from the prize winning rooster auction and began to introduce his farm animals to Rico, as so...

My grandparents are from San Juan, Puerto Rico, but the rest of my family is European.

I guess that makes me Quarter-Rican.

What do you call a hurricane that hits Puerto Rico?

A PR disaster

A priest and a rabbi are having lunch.

The priest is chowing down, and says to the rabbi, "Solomon, my friend, someday, somehow, you have to figure out a way for you to try some of this absolutely wonderful Iberico ham. It is heavenly!"

The rabbi responds, "I will Father Rico, I will."

The priest sits up. "When?"

Rab...

Last week, Puerto Rico's Governor said that they couldn't pay their debt.

From now on, the Island will be known as Puerto Pobre.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

New Treatment For Sunburn!

A guy visiting over here in Puerto Rico fell asleep on the beach for several hours and got a horrible sunburn, specifically to his upper legs. He went to the hospital, and was promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second-degree burns. With his skin already starting to blister, and the sever...

A friend of mine has never had Mexican before....

So I took him to a nearby food truck that had a delicious assortment of options. He went up to the food truck owner.

Friend: Hi I have never had Mexican before. I was wondering if you can describe what some of these are.

Food truck owner: Certainly sir! Which would you like to know ab...

Heard something on NPR that made me come up with this joke....What do you call it when the President can send you to war but you can't vote for the President?

Puerto Rico.

Apple pie costs 2$ in Cuba

Pumpkin pie costs 3$ in Jamaica

Banana pie costs 2.5$ in Puerto Rico

These are the PieRates of the Caribbean



A reporter was interviewing Hurricane Irma.

Reporter: "Now that you've been to the Bahamas and Puerto Rico, where are you headed next?"

Irma: "IM GOING TO DISNEY!!!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Japanese soccer team visits an orphanage in Spain.

"It's so sad to see the hopeless looks on their faces", said Rico, age 6.

Rich Man and the Ranch

A rich man owns a multi-million dollar ranch in Puerto Rico. One day, his ranch supervisor, Paco, calls him on the phone.
"Yes, Paco, what is it?" says the Rich Man.
"Well, Señor, I have some bad news. Your prize thoroughbred, he has died."
"My thoroughbred? I was going to make millions...

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