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Relationship Advice Jokes

Got some relationship advice from my plumber friend.

He told me to Pfister till she Moens.

Osama Bin Laden was trying to give me relationship advice.

Probably wasn't the best time to say "OK Boomer"

A man is giving relationship advice via calls

A man is giving relationship advice via calls to a friend

Friend: i don't want to leave her, i really care abo-

He replies: I can't hear you, you're breaking up

I wrote relationship advice for my future self couple years ago, since single people give the best advice.

I still give great advice.

A kid asks his Granddad for relationship advice...

"Grandpa, Jenny broke up with me today. I feel so bad, I don't know what I'm gonna do"

"Listen kid, you're gonna be alright. You're young and got plenty of time. Let me tell you about what qualities to look for in a woman to have a lasting relationship:

1) Find a woman who makes you la...

What do relationship advice and communist propaganda have in common?

There are loads of red flags involved.

I give excellent relationship advice..

Trust me, I've been in hundreds of relationships.

How do you give relationship advice to a male bug?

You tell him to bug-her off.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Taking relationship advice from family is like anal..

.. At first it hurts and is confusing.

But in the end you appreciate it.

I asked a friend for relationship advice and he told me to try breaking the ice

I don’t think she appreciated it when she fell through it into freezing waters

For my Cake day I would like to share my biologist wife's favorite joke.

Two girls are giving relationship advice to their friend.

The confectioner says:

"The quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach." And offers to help the girl bake a cake.

The doctor says:

"That is actually false, the quickest way to a man's heart is through the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two buddies are drinking at a bar..

.. having a good time. The older man mentions that he needs some relationship advice, that he has a big-time crush but isn't sure if they reciprocate.

The younger guy encourages him, saying he just needs to communicate it or maybe booze dat ass up and see where things go.

The older gu...

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