UPJOKE
ruindevastatedestroydesolateharrywastelay waste todestructionengulfwreakdecimateinundaterepopulateinfestunleash

What disease is ravaging canada?

hepatitis eh

This joke may contain profanity. šŸ¤”

Once there was a queen had the most massive pair of breasts in the kingdom

The knight-captain was obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death should he try to touch them, but he had to try.

One day the knight-captain revealed his secret desire to his old friend who was the royal physician. The physician thought ab...

This joke may contain profanity. šŸ¤”

Goldie was sitting on a beach in Florida...

Goldie was sitting on a beach in Florida, attempting to strike up a conversation with the attractive gentleman reading on the blanket beside hers.

"Hello, sir." she said "Do you like movies?"

"Yes, I do." he responded, then returned to his book.

Goldie persisted. "Do you like g...

This joke may contain profanity. šŸ¤”

One of the best jokes in the world?

A man has been stranded on a deserted island for 5 years. He is all by himself. His only source of pleasure is masturbation...but after 5 years, he has thought of every single fantasy 100s of times, and is therefore no longer able to get a hard on.

Depressed beyond belief, he sits alone an...

The Four Witch Covens

There were once four powerful witch covens: the witches of the mountains, the deserts, the forests, and the seas. For a thousand years they made war with one another, casting curses and hexes and bringing all manner of malady to the land in their hatred for one another. One day, they decided the onl...

This joke may contain profanity. šŸ¤”

Mrs. Rosentein is walking her poodle down 5th Avenue, when she ran into her good friend Gladys Goldberg

"Gladys! It's been so long since I've last seen you, where have you been?"

"Oh, Blanche, Ira and I went on safari in Africa, and let me tell you, it was horrible!"

"Horrible? How was it horrible?"

"Well, first, Ira lost our tickets, so we had to fly coach all the way from New Y...

This joke may contain profanity. šŸ¤”

An older couple is having trouble with their sex life, and the husband is too embarrassed to speak with a doctor.

The wife decides that she will see if her doctor can help them out, so she makes an appointment.

"What's going on?" the doctor inquires. "I just saw you a few weeks ago and you were in great shape!"

"Oh it's not for me," she tells him. "It's my husband, he's been having trouble becomin...

Polish Peasant finds a genie lamp

Polish peasant digs up an old lamp, rubs it, genie pops outā€”the usual scenarioā€”and offers him a wish. Pole scratches his head, says, ā€œI think Iā€™d like the Chinese to invade Poland.ā€ Genie does a double take, shrugs, and wham! The Chinese roar across Poland, burning and bayoneting everything in their...

Let me introduce the little known tale of Curtis Remond.

Curtis was born in the small town of New York, the only child of a rich and famous banking family. Curtisā€™ father was a banker. Curtisā€™ grandfather was a banker. The banking linage runs as far back in the family as time can remember, ever since Gerald Redmond had emigrated from Killarney back in the...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.