they discuss why they were arrested the first one says ”I showed up ten minutes late to work and was arrested for sabotage” the second one says “I showed up five minutes early to work and was arrested for espionage” the third one says “I showed up to work on time and was arrested for ownin...
If self sabotage was a sport
I would find a way to lose.
My dad once told me that my Ukrainian grandpa sabotaged reactor
I don’t think there was Among Us in 1986
What did Vito Corleone's brother Frank say when rival fishermen sabotaged his gear?
"Look how they massacred my buoy!"
I'm going to sabotage the winners' tents in the next boy scouts competition...
I'll knock them down a peg or two
How do you sabotage a space mission ?
Send Matt Damon
There was a curly haired painter who was very successful.
There was a curly haired painter who was very successful. But then there came a new artist who's painting rivaled even his own best pieces. The usually very calm and docile curly haired man started to resent this competition and plotted how to get rid of him. Over the years he tried, unsuccessfully...
Half my coworkers are imposters
They pretend to do the tasks and sabotage everything.
Friar's Flower Shop
Two brothers, Joey and Jimmy Bagadonuts, owned a flower shop in a small town in New Jersey, and business was great. They were the only game in town, until one day, two friars moved in across the street and opened their own flower shop. Having higher quality flowers, as well as the religious aspect, ...
During WW 2 a British commando is trained to drop into France and sabotage the enemy. He is given a full training and in his last session he is told where he will be dropped and that a bicycle will be there for him so he will be able to move around easily.
As he gets ready in the plane to j...
Three KGB inspectors decide visit a Siberian prison
They decide to check on three young prisioners who started working recently but were put in prison, and ask them some questions.
The first inspector asks the first prisoner:"How did you get in here?
He answers:"For the past week my clock would wake me up early so I came into work early...
About 50 years ago in Texas
The bee protection act was passed which made it illegal to sabotage/kill bees from other farmers.
This was due to the fact that many bee farmers would sabotage each other and it became so big that Texas congress had to pass a law.
The problem was so big that it allowed for capital puni...
Nikolia, Sergei, and Alexander are in a Soviet era Gulag together when Sergei asks
Sergei: So what did you two do to end up here?
Alexander: I was always early for work, so the government accused me of espionage and sent me here.
Nikolia: I was always late for work so I had to work later to make up for lost time. The government accused me of sabotage and sent me here...
Once in a village named Conclusion
there lived a farmer called Jump. He was very hardworking and honest farmer.
But there was a problem he faced he his line of work. He was allergic to hay. He would always get cold due to it. But as it was not avoidable, he had no choice but to work with it.
Things changed when he got ...
Three men are serving jail time in East Germany.
As they wait for time to pass, they eventually talk about why they were imprisoned.
The first one says: "Everyday, I got to work five minutes early, so they condemned me for espionage!"
The other two ask the second man.
He says: "Everyday, I got to work 5 minutes late, so they ...
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The Two Cow Philosophy
A CHRISTIAN DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbor
A SOCIALIST: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
A REPUBLICAN: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So what?
A DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neigh...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
The Mermaid Joke
On the outskirts of a small town in eastern Missouri, there once lived a farmer, his wife, and their three sons. Once upon a time their dairy farm had been huge, and business was booming. But a terrible cow-afflicting disease swept throughout the town, and hit this families bovine particularly hard ...
The Cheerio Joke
Oh boy do I have a joke for you... Its called the cheerio joke.
So there is this land called cheerio land and in cheerio land there are 7 classes of cheerio, 0-5 and the frosted cheerios. Now there is this level 0 cheerio. Hes hom...
Deep in Siberia, three prisoners huddle around a small fire and discuss their sentences.
"Every day, I arrived five minutes late to work," says the first. "Because I was careless, I was arrested for sabotage."
"Do not fool yourself," says the second. "Every day, I arrived five minutes early to work. I was arrested for spying."
The third stares quietly at the fire, rocking ...