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Metabolism Jokes

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A pregnant woman walks into a bank

and lines up at the first available teller. Just at that moment the bank gets robbed and she is shot three times in the stomach. She was rushed to the hospital where she was fixed up. As she leaves she asks the doctor about her baby.

The doctor says, "Oh! You're going to have triplets. They'r...

A nutritionist is giving a speech at a conference on eating healthy

Red meat is terrible for your metabolism, soda rips apart your gastric wall. Fast food is almost all fat and sugar but there's one food that is the worst of all. Almost all of us eat it sooner or later and the negative effects can last for years after a single consumption. Does anyone know what this...

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The man who loved marine mammals

There was a marine biologist, named Dr. Panglos, who loved marine mammals. (When I say he loved marine mammals though, I’m not talking about having sex with dolphins; he just loved to study them). He spent his time trying to feed and protect his beloved creatures of the sea. One day, in a fit of inv...

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Great joke for a bar...

Some time ago, a pregnant woman was waiting in line at the bank when a bank robber comes running in. The robber begins waiving around his gun and yelling at all the tellers frantically to give him the money and get down. A hidden security guard watches as the robber appears to be losing control an...

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