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Out with the girls...

The other night I was invited out for a night with the girls.

I told my husband that I would be home by midnight and even did a pinkie swear.

Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easily. Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home.

Just as I got in th...

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A young boy on his way home from school must pass by a group of streetwalkers

Every day as he passes them, they wave at him with their pinkies and say, "Hi there, little boyyy". One day the boy stops and asks one of them why they always wave at him with their pinkies. She replies, "Well... that's what size we imagine your penis to be. It's just a joke!"

The next day on...

3 war heroes come back from 'nam...

An officer approaches the heroes and says "For your valiant effort and heroic action i will give you a monetary reward. Pick 2 points on your body i will measure the distance between the points and give you $10 for every inch between them."

The first man thinks hard then says "i choose the ti...

Whats the best gadget to locate furniture in the dark?

Your pinkie toe.

An old man walks into a bar and sees a jar full of wrinkly, dried up lemon rinds...

An old man walks into a bar and sees a jar full of wrinkly, dried up lemon rinds. He sits down and orders a beer from one hell of a beefy, muscled bartender. He takes a shakey sip from his dark, dark beer, puts it back down, and asks about the lemons as old and shriveled as he is.

"We have a ...

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A man is on his way to work, and he's running a little late.

Right as he gets to the end of a bridge, he passes a police car and realizes he's speeding. The lights go on behind him, and he pulls over. The officer walks up to his window and says, "You were doing fifteen over, sir, what seems to be the hurry?"

The man responds, "I'm terribly sorry office...

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Another guy speeding joke.

A guy is in a rush to get to work, and he driving quickly.

He crosses over a bridge, and get's tagged by a cop and pulled over.

The cop slowly walks up to the car and asks for license and registration.

After they check out the cop returns and says, "Do you know why I pulled you...

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Bus of nuns goes over a cliff..

They all end up at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter is there and gathers them all up for the usual speech.

"Considering your life-long devotion to the Lord, we're able to make exceptions for your minor indiscretions. You'll all tell me what you did and go from there."

The first nun steps ...

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