A man is panhandling outside a casino in Las Vegas
He approaches a well-dressed couple, thinking they have some cash, and says, "Please, could you spare ten dollars? You see, my wife is sick and needs an operation. My insurance won't cover it all, and I need to come up with $25,000 to pay the hospital before they'll even consider scheduling her su...
One for you, one for me
On the outskirts of a small Panhandle town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts. “One for you, one for me, one for you, one for me,” said one boy. Severa...
All my other family members are wealthy and successful. In order to stand out, I decided to become a panhandler instead.
I beg to differ.
What do you call a hobo who can fly?
Two panhandlers meet after a long time and talk about their last year income
Guy 1: How did it go last year? Guy 2: Pretty decent, I was able to purchase a two bedroom apartment, a Ferrari and furnish my house. Guy 1: Whaaaaaat? How did you manage to do that, I have been on the streets 24x7 and have hardly managed to pay rent and look after my family? Guy 2: W...
A panhandler stops a man and asks for some money to buy something to eat...
The man replied, "I'll tell you what I can do, seeing as I'm on my way to the pub, how about I buy you a drink?"
The homeless man proclaims, "but I do not drink, I'm just looking for money to get something to eat."
"Well how about a couple of good cigars I've received from my l...
Jose and Carlos are panhandlers. They panhandle in different areas of town.
Carlos panhandles just as long as Jose but only collects 2 to 3 dollars every day.
Jose brings home a suitcase FULL of $10 bills, drives a Mercedes, lives in a mortgage free house and has a lot of money to spen...
What did the arthritic panhandler have for breakfast?
Begs and achin'
A woman runs into a panhandler on the street...
Panhandler: "Would you please spare me some change? I haven't eaten in three days.."
Woman: "Well, you've gotta force yourself."
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
THE HILLBILLY VASECTOMY
After their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed.
So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children.
The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy...
The college basketball team at Indiana University had just finished their worst season in school history.
The head coach, Bob, knew the team needed a different approach next year.
In the off season, Bob was driving around town when he saw a panhandler at a stoplight, and realized that this panhandler was around college age, and looked close to 7 feet tall. Bob stopped his car to talk to him and ...
A man is walking down the Vegas strip...
...and he is approached by guy in a threadbare suit, who says, "Please, mister, I really need your help. My wife, she needs an operation, and I was just told today, if she doesn't get it, she's going to die! My dear wife, the love of my life, might die! Please, anything you can give me would help. A...
Kansas, Colorado, New Mexico, and Texas are all about to Outlaw Interstate Begging
These four states are all against the Oklahoma panhandle.
Florida lawmaker Randall Thompson is forced to resign after it is revealed he spent taxpayer money on expensive footwear for his wife.
I guess Randall mishandled his panhandle sandal scandal.