UPJOKE
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Fred goes to a doctor.

He says, "Doc, I want to be castrated. "

Doc says, "Look, I don't know what kind of cult you're into or what your motives are, but I'm not going to do that sort of operation. "

Fred: "Doc, I just want to be castrated, and I'm a littlee mbarrassed about talking about it, but I have $5...

Did you hear about the crazy Mexican train thief?

He had loco motives.

She said, "boy, I know you got ulterior motives. You can't fool me." I told her, "nah, girl I got one clear motive."

^to ^fill ^this ^ever-deepening ^void ^of ^loneliness.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A group of Australian students where discussing if Trump became president who would he nuke and what would be his motives.

One of the students brightly said "Well, he has no motive to nuke us, we fought in Nam with them and we would be considered allies."

Another student says,
"He has motive to nuke New Zealand though."

The other students are intrigued as to why.

He says,
"Well he hates goat ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A vampire walks into a bar...

A vampire walks into a bar and goes straight up to the bartender and asks for a large warm glass of blood. Luckily, it happens to be a bar that serves vampires and quick as a tick the bartender hands over a long glass of blood, to which the vampire slurps it down happily.

Sooner than later, a...

A Train Goes on a Crime Spree

A train goes on a crime spree. When he was finally caught he was asked why he did what he did. "I don't know, I think I went crazy, guess you could say I had loco motives...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A list of puns

Here's a list of puns I've been collecting:

How do you throw a space party? You planet.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

Nope. Unintended.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention, but everyone was blow away by the leaf blower.

A scarecrow says,...

Why are Mexican train conductors so hard to convict?

Because they always have loco motives.

Cheddar, Gouda, Parmesan, Swiss, just making sure this will be the cheesiest post ever!

Thomas the Tank Engine's friend Fernando, who does the Mexico route was caught on dash cam video accelerating instead of braking for a stuck church van full of disabled children while yelling obscenities and screaming USA USA

When asked about his reasons for such carnage he said he's just loco and those are loco motives.

(Made it up with my son)

Did you hear about the Mexican Serial Killer?

He had loco-motives.

Why did the mexican man steal a train?

Well he had loco-motives

Math

Math the only world were you can buy 140 watermelons without your motives being questioned.

In the 1930s, a farmer attempted to steal cows from a neighbouring farm.

He became a bit of a local legend. No one knew exactly why he stole them, and we still don’t know to this day. Some say he was just in a desperate situation, some say these cows had been abused and that he was rescuing them, some say he was just a greedy old farmer.

He attempted this great bo...

What drove the conductor to commit his heinous crimes?

His loco motives.

I turned on the news to see a trainyard owner went ballistic, and killed all the people who worked for him

Officials say they don't understand the reasoning, but insist he had loco motives

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road

and not be
questioned about their motives.

Have you heard about the train killer?

They're still trying to find out his loco-motives

Why did Loki, Norse God of Trickery and Mischief, turn into a train?

I asked around and, well, no one really understands his Loki-motives.

Why are trains always put in insane asylums?

Because they have loco-motives

Did you know about the crazy train driver?

I hear he has tons of loco-motives.


I guess he is known to go off the rails.

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