UPJOKE
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An elderly couple see a doctor about how to deal with their short term memory loss.

The doctor says to help them remember certain things they should write it down on a piece of paper. One night the couple is watching TV, when the husband starts walking to the kitchen. His wife asks "Can you bring me some strawberries?"

"Sure."

"Aren't you going to write it down so you...

A man goes to the doctor to report a serious memory loss problem

Man: Doctor, I have a serious memory loss problem

Doctor: Hmm.. and since when did you have this problem?

Man: What problem?

If smoking marijuana causes short-term memory loss,

what does smoking marijuana do?

Memory loss (Long)

A man and his wife are growing older, and the doctor tells them their memory isn't that great. He tells them they should start writing things down to remember better. At home, the wife asks for a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream. She tells her husband to write it down, to which he responds that ...

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Do you know that too much sex can cause memory loss?

I read it in one book on page 37, on the 8th line, it was 16:23, Monday, January 4, 2016.

Do you know what I hate most about memory loss?

I forgot

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Having too much sex can cause memory loss!

Oh and also, I can't remember if I told you guys this but having too much sex can actually lead to memory loss!

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Did you know people who put concrete in their ass get memory loss?

I dont remember where i read that though

Psychiatrist: "How long have you had short-term memory loss?"

Patient: "As long as I can remember."

Listen, because I won't tell you again - I'm suffering from short-term memory loss.

Ah, and one more thing - I'm suffering from short term memory loss.

My mum suffers with short term memory loss

Hope it doesn't run in the family because my mums got it too

Alcohol can cause memory loss.

But, it can also cause memory loss.

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My friend told me excessive masturbation can lead to memory loss.

It’s the sixth time he’s told me.

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I've read that excessive sex causes memory loss:

It was in the British Medical Journal in May last year, page 12, paragraph 3. A nice sunny day I was reading in the park ...

Studies have shown that smoking weed causes short term memory loss.

Next thing you know they'll be saying smoking weed causes short term memory loss.

How many people with short-term memory loss does it take to...

I'm sorry, where was I?

i went to a support group for short term memory loss

the host said: "good evening, you're probably all wondering why you just walked into this room"

The phone rings and the lady of the house answers...

"Hello."

"Mrs. Joshi, please."

"Speaking."

"Mrs. Joshi, this is Doctor Kanitkar from Max Laboratory.

When your husband's doctor sent his blood sample to the lab last week, a blood sample from another Mr. Joshi arrived as well...

We are now uncertain which one belon...

The memory loss joke

This is a joke that ive heard a few times before but I don't think many found out about it:



Brother: Sorry about your memory loss. Hope you get it back."

Sister: "Eh, I'll forget about it."

Fun fact: Having friends gives you memory loss.

I read this in a textbook on page 53 at 4:37 PM on Friday May 12, 2006

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"Welcome to the Psychiatric Care Hotline ...

"Welcome to the Psychiatric Care Hotline.

If you have Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are Co-Dependent, have someone press 2 for you, now.

If you have Multiple-Personality-Disorder, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you have Short-Term Memory Loss, press ...

Short term memory loss

A doctor told his patient, “There’s good news and bad news. The bad news is, you have partial short-term memory loss.”

The patient said, “Oh no, Doctor. What’s the bad news?”

What do you call a show about two cokeheads with short term memory loss?

Whose Line Is It Anyway?

My mom suffers from short-term memory loss

I hope it's nothing genetic because I'm worried since my mom suffers from short-term memory loss

Hello and Welcome to the mental health hotline...

If you are obsessive-compulsive,
press 1 repeatedly.

If you are codependent,
please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities,
press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want.
Stay on the line so we can trace ...

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facts

did you know that having too much sex could cause memory loss ?

i remember reading that on the 23 of november 2001 at 9:1:02 am page 36 line 9/11

it wasn't a sunny day in fact it was very cloudy

very...cloudy....

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A sexologist is asked by a reporter...

Reporter: What is the most peculiar side effect of masturbating regularly?

Sexologist: It causes short term memory loss.

Reporter: Have u done any research on it?

Sexologist: On what?

A man wakes up the mental ward

Relax, sir, you've just had ECT.

What's that?

Electrical shock therapy. After a shock to the brain, you have temporary partial memory loss. Patients often forget about the things that cause them stress and tension, allowing to them to relax and get better.

Okay.

Now that ...

A man went to the doctor complaining about memory loss.

\-And when did this start? Asked the doctor.

\-When did what start? Replied the man.

r/jokes is like a guy with short term memory loss.

No matter how many times you tell him the same joke, he'll still laugh like he's hearing it for the first time.

A friend of mine who suffers from long term memory loss went to an employment agency to find what work he's suited for.

Today he became chief moderator for r/jokes.

How many short term memory loss patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

to get to the other side..

A doctor offers $100 if he can't cure your illness, otherwise you'll pay him $50.

A guy sees the sign and enters the clinic hoping to fool the doctor and easily make a hundred dollars.

"Doctor, I don't have my sense of taste!" says the guy.

"Here drink this." as the doctor hands him a tiny vial filled with unknown liquid.

The guy drinks from it and immediatel...

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Thank you for calling the Psychiatric Institute of Mental Health

If you have an obsessive-compulsive disorder, please press button 1. Again. And again. And again.

If you have a multiple personality disorder press in rapid sequence keys 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you suffer from paranoia, we have to inform you that we already know who you are, what you d...

An ok joke

Francis had memory loss. He was chatting with his friend, Richard, in his nursery home. Richard asks him “ Hey, how is that new memory clinic working out for you?”

“It’s going great!” Francis said. “I can remember everything.”

So then Richard asks him “ What’s the name of the clinic?”<...

An elderly man and his wife are losing their memory

An elderly man and his wife are losing their memory. Fearful that they may be developing early signs of dementia, Alzheimers, or the like, they speed off to their doctor. The doctor gives them a thorough examination and says, "Honestly, you are both in great shape and should take pride in your physi...

When I was drinking my coffee, I heard on the radio that caffeine causes memory loss.

Yeah, right. Next time, they're probably gonna say that caffeine causes memory loss.

Brett Favre reveals 'scary' memory loss

says he is not going back to play Pro Basketball

A Doctor claims to treat patients with 100% Results otherwise he will give 100$

A man walks inside the clinic and says **"Doctor, I have lost my taste buds. I can't feel the taste of anything."** The Doctor replies **"Don't worry. I will give you a syrup and you wil regain your taste buds. Nurse, pls give him the blue bottle."** The man drinks the content of the blue bottle and...

An old couple talks to their doctor about their memory loss. The doctor suggests that they write things down so they don't forget.

One day, both of them are sitting on the couch when Grandma asks for a bowl of ice cream.

"Coming right up," Gramps says, slowly getting onto his feet and heading towards the kitchen.

"Aren't you going to write that down?"

"Write that down? Of course not. I can remember a bowl o...

Alcoholic to God

God meets alcoholic and tells him that he has been doing a lot of wrong things so has to suffer. He tells him he can choose one out of two diseases.

* Parkinson's disease (hand will shake continuously)
* Alzheimer's disease (memory loss)

After thinking for some, he replied that he ...

An elderly couple started losing their memory.

They went to the doctor together to look into it. “Your memory loss is pretty bad. I’ll give you some medication for now, but in the meantime I suggest to start writing things down when you need to remember them”.

The couple reluctantly took the medication and went home, refusing to accept th...

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