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Lox Jokes

My friend was telling me about a salmon that could break into safes...

Turned out to be a lox myth.

How do you keep a bagel from getting away?

You put Lox on it..


RIP Paul Reubens.

A German man on his first trip to America decides to see New York City.

As he's wandering around the smell of corned beef and fresh baked rye bread draws him into a Kosher deli. The man sits at the counter, eyes the menu and says, "I vood like to try ze bagel and ze lox." In a thick accent.

On his first bite he's throughly enjoying his food and pipes up to the gu...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why can’t you put Jews in jail?

Because they eat lox

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two old men discuss their sex lives. (Long)

Mort and Saul meet every two weeks in the park and one day Mort says so, how's with you? Saul says Not so good, my sex life is not so good. What's wrong Mort asks. I haven't had sex in a long time Saul says. To which Mort says you should go see this hooker I know and ask for the bagel treatment. Wh...

I found this cool charity that lets you donate brined salmon to those in need.

Lox of Love

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

You know why they can't keep any Jews in prison?

They eat lox

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