What's the difference between two full time employees in America and a lasagne?
A Lasagne can feed a family of four.
I had some lasagne in the freezer that I planned on eating but I realized it was locked
And I had gnocchi
Lasagne is the GILF of foods...
...It's got culture and good taste, but down below its just a sloppy cheesy mess.
I make a mean lasagne.
It's quite average
My mother has been teaching me how to make my favourite meals, but there's one that I just can't seem to get right.
I'm great at lasagne, fantastic with casseroles but as soon as I get my hands on minced beef and beans..
After dinner I started to pack the dirty dishes into the dishwasher, when it suddenly started talking!
In a really dejected, pitiful voice it told me, "Don't bother pal, I'm useless. I'll never get that crusty lasagne off that pan. I'm terrible. The glassware will all have water spots by the time I'm done. I'm the worst appliance in this house!!"
I said, "What's wrong with you?!"
A Catholic, a Hindu and a Muslim go out to a restaurant.
When they've all decided on their meals they call a waiter over to the table.
"I would like the boef bourginon, please," says the Catholic,
"but as it is Lent, please do not cook it with wine."
The Hindu orders next. "I would like the lasagne, but please make sure it is mad...