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Irrational Fear Jokes

I've always had an irrational fear of speed bumps.

But I'm slowly getting over it.

Anatidaephobia is the irrational fear that somewhere, a duck or goose is watching you.

Iron Maiden tried to warn us about the fear of the duck

I have this wierd irrational fear of two letter words.

I get extremely scared just thinking about it.

I have an irrational fear of overly engineered buildings.

I have a complex complex complex.

I've developed an irrational fear of escalators.

I always find myself taking steps to avoid them.

I have an irrational fear of large intricate corporate buildings.

You could say I have a complex complex complex.

My psychiatrist asked me if I have any irrational fears…

I was afraid that she’d ask that

I have an irrational fear of modern architechture

My doctor says I have a complex complex complex.

My irrational fear of moving stairs seems to be getting worse.

You might say it’s… escalating.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Patient: I have an irrational fear of the Backstreet Boys

Therapist: tell me why


Patient: AHHHHHHHH

People said that I have irrational fear of lies.

Bu I'm afraid that is not true

Whoever named the irrational fear of long words,

didn't have hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was talking to my therapist about my irrational fear of letters.

Me: So, I'm afraid of random letters...

Therapist: You are?

Me: *Screams*

Therapist: Oh, I see...

Me: *Screaming intensifies*

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I hit a wall trying to cope with my irrational fear of sex

But I eventually got over the hump

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I realize i have an irrational fear of rats.

I didn't realize there would be so much wildlife in this city.One late night I was walking past this huge pile of garbage.Inside one of the trash bags there was a lot of movement.Really aggressive.It was starting to scare the shit out of me.My only thought was,"Oh God,I hope it's a baby.Please,plea...

I have an irrational fear of warrior princesses from different places.

You could say I'm xenaphobic

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I went to see the doctor about my irrational fear of palindromes.

Bastard prescribed Xanax.

Have you heard about the man with an irrational fear of empty spaces?

Nothing scares him

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A man is told by a friend that he needs to seek some help for his irrational fear

So he goes to see a new therapist. The therapist asks the man what his fear is. The man responds:

"I am afraid of the Backstreet Boys"


The Therapist then responds:


"Tell me why"

What do you call an extreme and irrational fear of transformers?

Transphobia.

What's another name for an irrational fear of clowns?

Common sense.

[OC?I just heard that superstar Phil Collins has an irrational fear of eating an inauthentic Vietnamese noodle dish.

He calls it faux-pho-phobia.

A Statistician Refuses to Fly

His friend asks him, "Why do you have this irrational fear of flying?"

"Irrational?" the statistician replies, "Not at all. I've merely calculated the odds of a bomb being placed on a plane and it's much too high for my comfort."

A few days later, the friend boarded a flight only to ...

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Therapist: What seems to be the problem?

Me: I have an irrational fear of those gas station slushies, y'know the ones you get for a dollar?

Therapist: I see.

Me: *Screams.*

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A parachutist is about to drop from a plane tommorow as part of a military excercise..

His mother calls him at midnight and with terror in her voice she says:
Do not go tommorow!! I saw a terrible dream, your parachute was not working and you were killed!! Please dont do it!!!
The soldier was terrified about his mothers dream but he still got into the plane. As the persons where...

I have a phobia of the square root of 2

It’s just one of my irrational fears

You've heard of Friday the 13th...

But what about the next day?
Pi Day the 14th: Irrational Fear

For some reason, my friend is afraid of fractions.

It's a completely irrational fear.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The monster under the bed

A man is upset about his irrational fear that there is a monster under his bed. He decides this needed to change so he starts going to a therapist. After months of therapy, his fear is still there, so he leaves the therapist to find someone who can cure him.

A month later the therapist runs i...

So my friend absolutely will not, cannot carpool.

He just flat out refuses to carpool. He has this irrational fear that if he carpools and the car crashes in a tunnel, he'll be trapped because there are too many people in the car.

It's called Carpool Tunnel Syndrome.

Contender for the worst pun ever (OC)

Meet Desmond. Desmond and his Father are pretty normal people, but they both have Podophobia, the irrational fear of feet.

One day, they both travel to do a tour of Southeast Asia and visit a family friend. As they’re walking about a city, Desmond see‘s a homeless person begging in shabby cl...

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