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Hypnotized Jokes

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I felt sorry for the hypnotist I saw last night

I felt sorry for the hypnotist I saw last night, he hypnotized 7 guys then he accidentally dropped the mic on his foot and yelled “FUCK ME”,
What happened next will haunt me for the rest of my life

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What do you call people who are into having sex while hypnotized?

Trancesexuals.

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A magician was performing at a nursing home.

The magician said he was going to hypnotize the people that he was performing for. He started hypnotizing them with his watch. When they were hypnotized the magician dropped the watch and he said "shit!". The nurses had a hard time after.

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Mind Your Words...

In a packed auditorium, a hypnotist hypnotized the whole audience with a Pendulum.
Suddenly, the Pendulum fell down.
He said "SHIT"...
It took 3 Days to clean the whole auditorium...

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Police were investigating an incident that happened during a hypnotist's show

A male hypnotist ended up in the hospital with multiple injuries. They interviewed a witness on what happened during the show.

Police: So, can you tell us what happened?

Witness: So we were watching a hypnotist doing his show, all is going well. He asked for volunteers from the audienc...

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The Hypnotist at a Senior Home

It was entertainment night at the senior citizens' center. After the community sing along led by Alice at the piano, it was time for the star of the show - Claude the Hypnotist!

Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance. "Yes, each and every one of you and all...

My wife hates that I smoke, so we're going to see a hypnotist.

I am going to have her hypnotized to not care.

A Vampire comes home for the night

A Vampire comes home for the night in bat form with blood covered all over his face, his three friends come up to him completely hypnotized by the scent of the blood, they ask him, “What did you get tonight?! That blood smells delicious!” The Vampire remains quiet and tells them not to worry about i...

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