Hamper Jokes - 20 Hilarious Hamper Jokes

Did you hear about the nun who used to punt her laundry into the hamper every day?

Last I heard she kicked the habit.

Police say their investigation into the shooting at the YouTube headquarters has been hampered...

...by having to sit through a 5 second advert before interviewing each witness...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men stand at Heaven's door.

Three men stand at Heaven's door. Unfortunately for them, Heaven was somewhat full so Saint Peter would only let those who died a tragic death to enter.

The first man, understanding the situation approaches.

"I came home to my apartment and found my wife was naked in bed and another ma...

A plane carrying picnic baskets has crashed in the jungle

Rescue attempts are being hampered

A family of Tortoise go on a picnic

A family of tortoise (Momma Tortoise, Daddy Tortoise, Uncle Tortoise, and Baby Tortoise) decide to go on a picnic. They pack up their hamper and begin their journey to the park.

A week later, they get to the park and unwrap their hamper and realize they've forgotten the salad dressing. They p...

A jockey was riding the favourite at a race meeting, and was well ahead of the field.

His horse rounded the final corner, when suddenly the jockey was hit on the head by a turkey and a string of sausages.

He managed to keep control of his mount and pulled back into the lead, only to be struck by a box of Christmas crackers and a dozen mince pies as he went over the last fence....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Pierre the French fighter pilot

Pierre the French fighter pilot has a few days off and he decides to take his girlfriend, Camille, down to the lake for a picnic.

They've had their fill of food and plenty of wine and are laying down looking up at the sky when Camille leans over and whispers in Pierre's ear, "Pierre, I love ...

My wife found a new way to get ne to pay attention

She says "the motorcycles trash needs to be taken out" or "the boats clothes need to make it into the hamper" or "this weekend card game I'm taking the kids to my parents and filing for a divorce"

I checked the bike and the boat and wanted to tell her they're all set before the card game but ...

Missing socks

When you lose a sock in the wash or laundry hamper, the one that's left becomes more human than you know.

It's looking for its sole mate.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A New Suit

Joe was a successful lawyer, but as he got older he was increasingly hampered by incredible headaches. When his career and love life started to suffer, he sought medical help. After being referred from one specialist to another, he finally came across an old country doctor who solved the problem....

Two men have been selected for an expedition to the North Pole

Their names are George Bernard and William Briggs. On this journey they’ve been given a state of the art ship to cross through iceberg laden waters unscathed and plenty of supplies for the trip. On the 20th of December George and William set off on their expedition. Unfortunately, unbeknownst to the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Running Issues

Last week I went on a sponsored 5k race around the town. Got off to a great start and I lead the first mile, when all of a sudden someone in the crowd lining the streets threw a small box of artisan chocolates at me, smacked me right in the head. But I kept on going, and a moment later again from th...

My friend has been hiding something.

I was cleaning my friend's room for him the other day and moved a pile of clothes off of the floor and into the hamper. To my surprise, when I lifted them, I found a perfectly gelled, expertly trimmed mustache on the ground, I saw him the next day and confronted him about my discovery. ''You got me....

A husband buys a car for his wife...

So she can run some errands while hes at work. He gets home from work and sees the car parked a couple houses down. He ask the wife:

Husband: Why is the car parked their?

Wife: I went to the grocery store and on the way back, it just stopped. Can you fix it?

Husband: What d...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Mom is doing laundry

It's Tuesday and the stay home mom is doing laundry. She picks up the clothes from her hamper then proceeds to her daughter's room. Knocks on the door, walks in, asks her daughter for her dirty clothes at which point her daughter hands over a small hamperfull. Mom then proceeds to her son's room kno...

The mother of the bride and her daughter were packing for her honeymoon night.

The daughter asked her mother to pack her black nightgown. The mother looked everywhere but couldn’t find it. Time was running short so she grabbed her daughter’s pink negligee from the laundry hamper and stuffed it into the suitcase.

After the wedding, the newlyweds went to their hotel room...

Boudreaux Joke

Boudreaux's wife don't come home one night.Boudreaux is sick with worry. Three days later Thibodaux comes to Boudreaux' door and tells him "I gots you some good news and some bad news" Boudreaux says" I'm a man,give me the bad news first". Thibodaux says " We just found your wife Clotilde dead, flo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

James is suffering from severe headaches. [Long]

For as long as he can remember, he's had debilitating headaches that have hampered his life in every way. He finally seeks medical help. After some tests, the doctor returns:

"James, I don't know quite how to say this. It seems your testicles are pressing against the base of your spine, pi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Coldest Igloo

Three Eskimos are sitting around an ice hole fishing when the topic of coldest igloo pops up.

The first Eskimo says, "My igloo is definitely the coldest. I'll show you"

So they all head over to the first Eskimo's igloo where he says, "Watch this."
He gathers up a big wad of spi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man goes to his doctor with a sore arm.

He sits down on the exam table and the doctor looks at his arm.
"What seems to be the trouble today, Mr. Wainscotting?", the doctor asks.
"Doc, I've got terrible pain starting in my bicep and extending down to my forearm." replies Mr. Wainscotting.
"Let's have a look."
The doctor examine...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.