During this difficult morning for Congressman O’Rourke and everyone involved with his campaign, I wanted to give some words of encouragement

Beto luck next time

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A married couple were lying in bed one night.

The wife had curled up ready to go to sleep and the husband put his bed lamp on to read a book. As he was reading, he would pause and reached over to his wife and slide his fingers down there. He would do this only for a very short while. Then he would stop, and resume reading his book. A few minute...

Saw a guy come racing out of our local flower shop, arms full of random product. Then the shop owner rushed out after him. I couldn't help, so I just yelled encouragement to her:

"Run, florist! Run!"

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Timmy and Sally were at a school dance.......

At the dance Timmy and Sally sat on opposites sides of the hall. Timmy with the boys and Sally with the girls.

They were both born with genetic disorders.

* Timmy was born without a left eye but he wore a wooden prosthetic in its place.
* Sally was born with a cleft palate, the corr...

What do you say to give an electrician encouragement?

"You conduit!"

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A pastor is headed to Pittsburgh

A pastor is headed to Pittsburgh for a convention with his associate preacher and they decide to take the train.

At the station, the pastor tells his associate to have a seat while he purchases their tickets.

After standing in line at the ticket counter for an extended period of time...

Do you know what the secret of encouragement is?

Of course you don't.

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A CEO has a business meeting in Japan

He flies in the day before and is going to stay at a hotel when he decides to spice things up and hires a prostitute. That night, in the room, they are fucking when she starts screaming "anachigai, anachigai" which he assumes is just encouragement of some kind as he doesn't speak Japanese. The prost...

God wrote an email....( kinda long )

So apparently god decided recently to check up on the earth and see how things were going. God summoned one of his angels. God told the angel to go down to earth and evaluate how humanity was doing. After several months the angel returns and reports that about 95% of humanity isn’t really following ...

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Green ping pong ball.

These was once a girl, Sara, whos third birthday was coming up, and as this was the first time she was old enough to really understand what was happening, her parents asked her what she wanted.
"I want a green ping pong ball!" Sara answered immediately and without a hint of uncertainty. The par...

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A doctor, a lawyer and an engineer

It's September 1793, in Paris, France. A crowd of several thousand has gathered at the Place de la Concorde.

A doctor, a lawyer and an engineer are lined up for execution. All three women are accused of conspiring against the Revolutionary government.

Nodding to the smiling crowd, the ...

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A young couple enters a quiz about their sex life [NSFW]

The man is taken into a separate room, where he is explained the quiz: he will get 3 questions, and if his girlfriend's answers match his, they win.

"The first question", the quizmaster says, "when did you last have sex?"
The man responds "last night".
"The second question is 'with ...

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We'd lost that loving feeling

My wife and I are in our 50s. We still loved each other, but for one reason or another, we'd not had sex for a few years.

Deciding it was time to change that, we went to our family doctor. We told her our issue and she prescribed something
that would increase our labidos. She said it would...

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A husband and wife save thousands of dollars for their dream golfing trip abroad...

A man and his wife and save thousands of dollars, pack their bags and go on their dream golfing trip abroad.

The golf course is a thing of beauty, perfect greens, giant sculptures, huge sparkling blue lakes, the finest sand pits, and amazing views. The rich of the world all have mansions and ...

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