UPJOKE
dry outplainaridparcheddesiccatedehydrateseardried-upthirstysoberwaterlessscorchedshrivelledshriveledwithered

Just returned my hair drier.

It sucked.

I thought my drier was shrinking my clothes because they don't fit any more.

Turns out, it was my refrigerator all along.

What happens when you put a drier sheet in the washing machine?

It becomes a wetter sheet.

(original joke. Can't find it anywhere)

Even though there's a picture on the hand drier,

I have yet to receive my 3 strips of bacon

I have a coworker whose humour gets drier

...as he gets more dehydrated.

(True story)

I was folding my pants, fresh out the drier, and found a dollar in a pocket. Jesus Christ...

How long have I been laundering money?

Today I saw a penny in a urinal and wondered what they wished for.

I'm wishing for a drier pocket.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two strangers discussing religion

So, a woman sits beside a sharply dressed man in a flight to Tokyo.

Having a lot of time to kill, the man initiates a conversation with the woman, asking her about her religion and how God created the universe, etc.

"Well, first I’ve got a question for you", said the woman.

"Cow...

A prison decides to renovate its showers

An ageing prison facility is constantly beset by long queues for the shower area, which the managers decide to do something about because having all the prisoners together in one area outside of their cells might get nasty. So they look into the problem, and realise that, although the showers themse...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An American Tourist in Japan

An American tourist is in dire need of a toilet while waiting in the lobby of a Japanese hotel. The men's room in the lobby has an enormous line, while the ladies' room is completely empty. Desperate, the man goes up to the manager and says, "I'm sorry, but I really, really need a toilet, would you ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Fog Monster

Long, long ago, there was a village which had its very existence constantly threatened by a terrible fog monster. For a while, none would trade with the village, for even outsiders feared this hostile aberration, which could attack without warning and slay an army without leaving a trace. Several ge...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.