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Craves Jokes

What's the first thing a vampire craves in the morning?

Black coffin

What's the difference between a vegan and a straight male submissive?

A vegan craves umami. A male sub craves "ooh mommy".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My wife went out today, so I had my hands full watching our daughter. She's kind of a whirling dervish, running around, bouncing off the walls, when suddenly, she stopped to play with my computer, broke the R button and tried to eat it...

She craves anarchy...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Harold and Phil are out golfing

Phil craves a smoke, so he pulls out a cigarette and asks Harold if he has a light.

"Sure", says Harold. He reaches into his golf bag and pulls out a massive foot-long gas lighter.

"Wow, where did you get that huge lighter?" asks Phil.

"My genie", says Harold.

"Your... ge...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man was walking in the desert...

A man was walking in the desert, however he is now lost. He has survived for two weeks already, but he is craving for sex. In week three he sees a camel. Because the man is so desperate for sex, he turns a bucket he collected upside-down and starts thrusting towards the camel.

The camel howev...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Too much cock..

A man goes to a doctor claiming his speech impediment is effecting his life, no one will hire him, no females will talk to him, no one wants to be his friend because of the way he talks and something needs to be done. The doctor curiously looks into the situation.
“Turns out your penis is to...

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