Obi Wan Kenobi decides he wants a change of pace so decides to put his skills into becoming a marriage councillor.
One day a familiar face pops in, Luke Skywalker. Luke sits down an immediately bursts into tears as his new wife is absolutely awful. For three hours Luke talks, almost non stop, about all the horrible things she does to him - putting green milk in his cereal, signing him up to the Jar-Jar fanclub, ...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
My grief councillor died recently
Thankfully he was so good that I don't give a shit
EDIT: *Counselor, I can't spell it would seem
EDIT 2: Credit to Gary Delaney, for this is one of his one liners. Credit to the redditors who pointed it out
My Bereavement Councillor Just Died
He was so good at his job I didn't give a damn
A policeman arrests a well dressed man in a suit and tie, walking down the Main Street of the city talking on his cell.
The man has a desk strapped to his back, complete with laptop, printer and filing cabinet. He has a dustbin on his head.
“Hold on councillor, I have a policeman trying to arrest me, and I haven’t got a clue why.” He turns and asks “What are the charges?”
“Impersonating an office, Sir”
I phoned the Drugs Awareness helpline today.
"Can I speak to the Cocaine Councillor please" I asked. "You'll have to wait" he replied,"he's on another line."