Climate Change Jokes

...we're definitely getting warmer.

It always turns into a heated debate

Even the Antarctic ice sheets are cracking up.

You tell him Obama didn't care about it.

Only four parachutes though.

Fauci takes one, says "I’ve got to live so I can find a cure for this pandemic and jumps out of the plane."

The Pope takes one, says "I have to be there to provide spiritual guidance to the faithful during this pandemic and he jumps out."

Trump takes... read more

The atmosfear.

It's just not cool anymore

Just think how dumb we'd look in front of our children, if twenty years from now we discover climate change was in fact not real. We'd have cleaned the ocean and the cities, preserved the rain forests and millions of species, innovated in multiple industries, made the air breathable again, created a... read more

Trick question: U.S. politicians can't solve anything.

They've both been commonplace since the 80's, but boomers still don't understand them

Somebody lit the dinosaurs on fire.

But I'm warming up to the theory.

Denial ain't just a dry patch of sand in Egypt

I Just drive everywhere instead

Vin Diesel even changed his name to Vin Solar

I replied, I thought that’s what we were all trying to do, then we’ll stop.

It’s 2020.

Egyptian Crocodiles.


Because they live in the Nile.

We would have improved air quality in all major cities, gotten rid of noisy and smelly cars, cleaned up toxic rivers and destroyed dictatorships funded on money from oil for no reason.

A guy goes into a bar, there's a robot bartender. The robot says, "What will you have?"
The guy says, "Martini."
The robot brings back the best martini ever and says to the man, "What's your IQ?"
The guy says, "168."
The robot then proceeds to talk about physics, climate change, and AI m... read more

They're doing it for the Greta good.

I mean the excess water just flows down the edge of the Earth.

One day the last man on earth went out for a stroll through the wasteland. As he was walking along, a giant, silver flying saucer burst out of the sky and landed before him. The door slowly opened and out of the craft came a little green fella who saw the man and shouted “Hey! What happened here?” T... read more

And then you all will be sorry.

God says to them "You may ask any question of me."

The first man asks "Was the Maui fire started by a space laser to clear out residents so the rich could buy up all the land?

God says "No my child. It was a combination of poor agriculture and climate change."

The fir... read more

Blame it on the poor.

Because they want to melt the snowflakes!

It's as if they lived in de Nile

According to one expert on YouTube it is plain unsettling.

Mother Earth: Hold My Beer.

... in Utah.

What are you talking about? The bulb is fine.

The climate changes when it gets tired of wearing the same old clothes.

One's a worldwide problem.

The other's a wideworld problem.

apparently he doesn't think America can sink any lower either.

Wall-E

One day, a family started hearing loud talking coming from underneath the ground in their backyard. They figured maybe the plumber who did some work yesterday left a radio down there.

They sat and listened to the talking, then realized it was mostly about climate change and UFO’s.

They... read more

Motel Coronavirus



On a dim dreary morning

Ceiling fan stirs the air

Stale beer and Doritos

Littered next to my chair

Just outside of my window

Saw a glimmer of light

My eyes were bloodshot and my head pounding

I hadn't slept all last ni... read more

Every day it gets worse and Republicans try to deny it.

The rest of them are in North America.

The Al-Gore-Rythms!

“Potential Water Front Property”

Everything here is recycled anyway...

There's no punchline, ive already told you the joke.

He saw the climate change

Every time she comes on the TV approximately 1 million people switch it off

I should have checked the Denier rating

But that’s because he doesn’t understand what the media means when they say:

“Donald Trump is the most **Polarizing** President America has had since Nixon.”

The sign reads "The End Is Near! Turn Back Before It's Too Late!"

Well, along comes a redneck, driving a jacked-up pickup truck and swiggin' a Coors Lite.

He screeches to a halt before the three men of the cloth, surveys their sign for a moment, and bursts into uncontrollable guffaws.... read more

That's all. What's a good follow up? It's a climate change joke. Idk.

...and immediately calls the doctor over to his hospital bed.

"Doctor, I need to know; who won the election? Was it Sanders? Clinton?"

The doctor shakes her head. "Let me put it this way: there's good news and there's bad news."

"What's the bad news?" the Democrat asks.

"... read more

It’s an Al Gore ithm.

An Al Gore Rythym

More like climate please don't change am I right?

Now we can all understand the heartache Popeye felt after the tragic end of his wife.

Arctic terns, birds long famous for their thousands of miles migratory habits, have been profoundly affected by climate change. Researchers have determined that as landmarks have disappeared due to loss of ice, some terns get stressed to the point of prematurely ending their flights.

Exposur... read more

Bringing back the cold war to combat climate change.

Truly a man of the ages.

Climate change scientist: You're missing the point, Boys.

Trump wants to buy Greenland. That way when climate change removes the last bit of snow from the area, he can proclaim that he achieved what no one else in history could. He made Greenland, green again.

Climate change, pocket change...

But around October I started supporting global warming

An Al-Gore-rhythm!

I know that because Alex Jones told me so

I told him they were just plants.

I got two dollars and fifteen cents back in climate change.

Due to this he never really talked much until one day when he signed up to talk in a debate about climate change. When it came his turn he began to speak and of course everyone noticed his speech impediment right away. A member of the opposing view interrupted him and asked “what are you doing?” The... read more

They know that, because of those pesky humans, it will be their last meeting in a long time. Zeus is attempting to combat climate change, Poseidon is dealing with rampant pollution and rising sea levels, and Hades needs to update his infrastructure to deal with the massive influx of souls after WW3.... read more

Climate change is man-made.

I encountered a time traveler today. During my self isolation he came to the door dressed in a hazmat suit. I was of course alarmed when I opened the door to such a site. He quickly explained who he was and asked if he could have just a few minutes of my time. I didn't believe anything he was sa... read more