Cattle Farmer Jokes - 8 Hilarious Cattle Farmer Jokes

Why do cattle farmers gamble so much?

They like to raise the steaks.

A cattle farmer walks into a store

and asks the cashier "can I pay in meat", to which the cashier responds "as long as it's tender".

I'm really sorry

Did you hear about the cattle farmer that experimented with feeding his cow cannabis?

The results were promising at first but it turned out the steaks were too high.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A cattle farmer had three sons...

Mark, Jakob, and David.

Mark and Jakob weren't much for farm life.
Mark took off at 16 for the city, and didn't come back.
Jakob waited until he completed college, whenceforth he became a businessman and lawyer.

David, however, stayed with his father on the farm his whole life t...

What do a cattle farmer and a compulsive gambler have in common?

They're both interested in raising the stakes/steaks.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What deal did the undead entrepreneurial cattle farmer advertise?

Shit for Brains

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The bull trick (a bit long)

An old cattle farmer is being helped by the local vet with his herd of cows and bulls. It is breading season and some of his older bulls are having a bit of a hard time performing. These are top of the line studs, but age is finally catching up with the bulls. The farmer laments to the vet "Well, I ...

So farmer Bob had a rivalry with farmer Jim.

They were both cattle farmers but Jim's herd was much larger and fatter, and his meat went for much more money. So bob started looking for a way to bulk up his cows. He started experimenting. Eventually he discovered that feeding them marijuana made them grow exponentially, while also making them mo...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.