I went to the book store in town

to get a book about tortoises.

”Hardback?” asked the clerk.

”Yes,” I replied. “They also have little, tiny heads.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy goes to a book store and asks the clerk if they have any books for guys with small dicks. The clerk says, "It's not in yet"

The guy says, "That's the one!"

What was the most popular book store in the Roman Empire?

Barnestantinoble

A man is walking through his local mall and notices a Mexican book store

He decides to go in because he has never seen a Mexican book store before. He browses through the store and finally asks the clerk, "Do you have the book on Donald Trump's foreign policies with Mexico?"

The clerk replies, "F*ck you, get out, stay out!" The man replies, "Yeah, that's the one!"

The other day in a book store I saw one that was called “How to live with 5$”

It costed 8.50$

Went to the book store for the Christmas sale “1/3 off all titles”

I got a lovely copy of “The Lion, The Witch”

I went to a book store and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was

she said if she told me it would defeat the purpose.

What’s a Russians favorite book store?

Barnes & Chernobyl

Did you hear about the guy who stole $10,000 worth of textbooks from the University book store?

They made him return both of them.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is at a mall and sees a Mexican book store.

Curious, he walks in to see the selection, and wonders if they have the book he's looking for. So he goes up to the shop owner and asks "do you have the latest book by Donald Trump?"

The shop owner states at him in confusion for a second and yells "Fuck you, get out and stay out!"

Man ...

I went to the Muslim book store this morning and asked for Trump’s new book on immigration reform.

The shop owner said ‘Get the hell out and never come back!’

I said ‘Yeah, that’s the one! You have it in paperback?’

Today I went to a book store and found: "the only book you'll ever need to buy".

Volume 2

I'm like a comic book store

I got so many issues...

My favourite thing to do is to walk into book stores and say “Hello! I'm looking for a book titled ‘How to deal with rejection without killing’.”

“Do you have it?”

I just bought a new dictionary at my local book store, but when I got home the pages were blank...

I have no words to describe how angry I am.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

While walking through the mall I spotted the Islamic Book Store and I went in.

The clerk asked me, "can I help you?" I said, "yes, can you tell me where I can find Donald Trump's book on refugees?" He turned beet red and said, "eat shit, get the fuck out and stay out." I said, "yes, that's the one, now where is it located?"

Why did the bull tear up the used book store?

They were all read.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Mr. Tilley is running a Christian book store in a strip mall. [Long]

And business is good. The community has been growing, both in economy and spirit, with community centers and parks, factories and research laboratories. A true mecca of modern civilization. Mr. Tilley knows everyone in town, and everyone knows him. When anyone sees him, they smile, wave, and say "Bl...

Muslim book store

So there I was walking through a mall and I saw a Muslim book store. I was interested what was in a muslim book store so I went in.
The clerk approached me asking if I need help knowing I probably don't look like his normal customer so I asked if he had a copy of Donald Trumps book on his U.S. I...

Adult book store

Three guys are arrested in an adult book store and appear before the judge. He asks the first guy to stand:
"What is your name?" he asked.
"George," the guy answered.
"And why were you arrested?" the judge asked.
"I was by the magazine rack holding a big fat cigar and blowing smoke,"...

Religious Grandma Still Drives

Dear Grand-daughter,

The other day I went up to our local Christian book store and saw a 'Honk if you love Jesus' bumper sticker.

I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting.

So, I ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Jewish boy loved reading books

After he read each book in his house he started going to the local library. He went there every day until he has read every book.
One day he visited a nearby book store and asked the owner if they had any books he hadn't read before.
The old owner picked up a book named "Death" from underneath...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Divorce Attorney

Squeezing Every Last Drop

Out of Ya


A father walks into a bookstore with his young son. The boy is holding a quarter. Suddenly, the boy starts choking, going blue in the face. The father realizes the boy has swallowed the quarter and starts panicking, shouting for help.

A w...

A penguin’s car breaks down in a Florida town [NSFW]

He manages to push it to a nearby mechanic. The mechanic says it’ll take a few hours to repair, so the penguin, exasperated, goes to look around the town.

He goes into a clothing store and buys a nice shirt, and goes to a book store and buys some nice books. However, the penguin, being in Flo...

One Guinness please

"Ma'am, I'd like to order a Guiness."

"You must be Irish."

"Oh, so ordering a Guiness makes me Irish? If I ordered a Pizza, would you assume I'm Italian?"

"I didn't..."

"And if I ordered a Bratwurst, would that make me German?"

"No, but..."

"So why exactly d...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My penis is in the Guinness book of records.

At least it was till that book store lady kicked me out.

I wanted to buy some literature on DIY shelving

Sounds easy, but try going into a book store and asking if they have "any books on shelves"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My dick was in the Guinness's book of world records

Up until the employee of the book store threw me out.

--------------------------------------------------------
Credit to some Israeli guy for the joke.

If I was a smart thief, do you know what I would rob?

A book store.

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