Sure, I might flip over a table in an argument, but I'd never tip over a bookcase.

I have too much shelf respect.

My friend got crushed in IKEA yesterday when a Billy Bookcase fell on his head. He said he can't sue though.

It was shelf inflicted.

Sean Connery was arranging his bookcase when one of the books fell from the top and landed on his head.

Unfortunately Sean Connery only had his shelf to blame.

Sean Connery built a magnificent bookcase

It was the centerpiece of the library in his mansion and even the Queen herself praised it as one of the top bookcases in all of England. Everyone who ever visited his library has marvelled at the sheer greatness of this bookcase and many said that if acting didn't work out, that he would have had ...

A bookcase I built just collapsed

I have only my shelf to blame.

I know the pandemic is causing people to struggle financially, but honestly, I'm making a fortune.

I rent out bookcases to be installed behind everyone doing a TV interview about either Covid or the Impeachment process.

Husband and wife are putting up Holiday decorations

when husband offers to hang the wreath. “But sweetums, you are inept and you have no tools,” says the wife. Husband shrugs and goes to Lowe’s to buy a hammer. He walks past a display for the new, Elf Steam Multi-Tool. The marketing was brilliant and it had a drill, three saws, and a sander - all wor...

I've got an Ikea bookcase that's lasted me 30 years.

Granted, it was in pieces for 29 of those.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So I put a suction cup dildo on my bookcase for my wife

She slapped me and said "You can go fuck your shelf".

What did the depressed bookcase say?

I'm going to kill my shelf

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Royal Newspaper

The Queen was overjoyed to receive a new royal pet, a tiny Siamese kitten. But one day, the kitten simply disappeared and servants searching high and low could not find her.

One servant thought he heard a scratching noise behind a small mouse hole in the wall, so the King ordered the hole to...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man wakes hungover

A man wakes up in his bed with a terrible hangover. He looks to his bedside table and finds some ibuprofen and a glass of water. He glances around the bedroom and sees that it is cleaner than usual and his work clothes are laid out. He pops the ibuprofen and washes it down with water, and finds a no...

That moment when your neighbour is ringing at your door at 3am like crazy...

But luckily you‘re still awake because you‘re drilling holes for your new IKEA bookcase

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