Bland Jokes

It needs addressing.

I thought I got Covid-19.

He ran out of thyme

Clearly, she put her heart and soul into it.

The doctor told her that it wouldn't harm him, as long as he took a multivitamin to replace the C and B vitamins that are deficient in dog food.

Six months later, he saw her in the grocery store, "How's your husband doing on the dog food diet?"

"He died."

"What! Real... read more

Jesus is the reason for the season.

I visited a little cafe not too far from the Royal Mile in Edinburgh, and ordered a coffee and a donut. The coffee was bland and cold but worst of all the donut was stale.
“Excuse me” I said “these donuts are stale.”
The assistant was polite “I’m sorry sir, those are yesterday’s donuts.”
“W... read more

It's a well known fact that bears find unseasoned hikers bland and tasteless.

He turned to his angels and said, “ They shall live on a miserable damp island, they’ll barely get along with each other and be constantly on each other’s throats if not dealing with other countries, have bland food, the worst dental hygiene and have this insufferable fantasy about their country bei... read more

For those that enjoy a bland, tasteless joke.

His older, strong-armed and favoured son, Jedediah worked hard every day, getting up extra early every morning to milk the cow before dutifully doing the rest of his chores.

The farmers delicious milk became very popular around the area with neighbours often walking miles in for a glass and ... read more

"It's good to get out and eat for once. When I eat at home the food is always so cold and bland," he tells the bartender. "Why is that?" the bartender asks. "I don't know," the guy replies. "I'm guessing because my wife really puts her heart and soul into cooking for me."

Doctors have diagnosed him with colour-blandness.

So I'm working on a project with a partner that needs to explain how potatoes and oranges can become batteries by sticking metal in them. I don't want it to be bland though, so if you guys can tell me how to make it funny it'd be great! Thanks

She's white, bland, uninspiring and not tasty unless dipped in melty cheese.

The hotel is one of the most resplendent hotels imaginable, a surprise as the man was expecting rather bland accommodation. As comes with such high standards, there is a computer in the man's room.

He decides to send an e-mail to his wife, but unfortunately typed in the wrong messaging addres... read more

A Milwaukee man and his wife recently received a call from an old friend whom they had not seen for years. Just before the three sat down to a little supper in the German style, the wife, seizing a favorable opportunity, whispered to her husband:

"We have only three bottles of beer in the hou... read more

To encourage reflection, the monks who vow silence are required to share one thought on the five-year anniversary with the head Monk.

After five years, the monk meets with the head monk and he says, "food is bland, should be spicy to engage our senses!"

Five years later, another tho... read more

I'll try and transcribe them the way he writes them down, but it is pretty hard since most of them are written in cursive.

Husband got up early Sunday morning to fly a kite. He is having a hard time, kite is going up and down. Wife is watching from the window in her nighty. Finally, she becom... read more

It is a little known fact that some people want spices that they cannot obtain legally. Be it decades-old oregano, salt from the Last Supper, or the flesh of Sean Spicer, some people love strange and unusual spices. However, in order to obtain these spices, they only have one place to turn: the Spic... read more