I love asterisks!*

*sometimes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The asterisk was invented by someone seeing a cat's butt and thinking that it would make a great punctuation mark.

It was almost a catastrophe.

In the World of Punctuation, Asterisks give a party...

In the World of Punctuation, Asterisks give a party.
The party is for Asterisks only, and only Asterisks can enter.
At some time the doorbell rings. One Asterisk opens the door and sees a Dot.
The Asterisk says to the Dot:
"I'm sorry, you cannot enter, this party is for Asterisks only"...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

You know what winds me up

it's not people that say ectcetera when they mean etcetera, tenderhooks instead of tenterhooks or even asterix instead of asterisk .

It's people who say the travelling community when they mean thieving pikey bastards

A blonde is taking money out of an ATM,

when the blonde behind her in line says, "Ha! Ha! I know your password. It's four asterisks."

The first blonde replies, "Ha! Ha! No it's not. It's 3862."

Note to self: Never make my password a bunch of little stars.

That would be too much of an asterisk.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I know everyone is tired of the negativity with all the recent events...

I'm negative too. I'm sorry. I can't help it. I just can't comprehend how this guy is so successful. How did he win? And to be on the biggest stage in the world now. It doesn't make sense. No one ever thought he was a real contender, but here he is.

With all the scandal, how people think his ...

Blonde

A new blonde employee calls the Help Desk to complain that there's something wrong with her password."The problem is that whenever I type password,it just shows stars,"she says."Those asterisks are to protect you."the Help Desk technician explains,"so if someone were standing behind you,they wouldn'...

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