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Assuage Jokes

Those who have an obsession with meat and anagrams are tough to please.

They're really hard to assuage.

A prison decides to renovate its showers

An ageing prison facility is constantly beset by long queues for the shower area, which the managers decide to do something about because having all the prisoners together in one area outside of their cells might get nasty. So they look into the problem, and realise that, although the showers themse...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The First Lady is touring a hospital......

...and wants to go into the "Special Cases" ward. The head doctor looks a little nervous, but agrees and takes her into the ward. Inside the first room they come to, she spies a man on a bed, red-faced and puffing loudly as he masturbates at a furious pace.
Shocked, the First Lady scowls at the d...

A Lobster Walks Into a Bar

He goes up to the bartender and says: "Look, before you can serve me, I need to advise you that I'm a lawyer."

"Blimey... A lobster lawyer? That is impressive," says the bartender.

The Lobster puts his briefcase up on the bar, deftly opens it with his claws, and produces a document tha...

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