UPJOKE
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Aspirations

A young boy one day decided to make his desire to become a big writer.

"I want to write things that the people will read all around the world, something that the people will react with a very high emotional level such as scream, cry, get mad and make them suffer" He said.

Now he works ...

What do you call a pig with high aspirations in life?

Hambitious

What do you call someone that had great potential in highschool, but now has no friends, no career aspirations, and is satisfied with a menial job?

Idk what others would say, but I know my dad is refusing to call me "son"

Pun Fact

If you accidentally inhaled an edibleโ€ฆ you would have high aspirations.

The definition of an asparagus:

A bean with aspirations of becoming a paintbrush.

My sick husband said, "I just wish l could breathe."

You could say he has high aspirations.

Two amoebae are floating along in a prehistoric ocean.

Amoeba 1: Weird...I think I just took in a breath of air.

Amoeba 2: Nah. You're probably imagining things.

Amoeba 1: Yeah. False aspirations, I guess.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Murphy Was A Very Religious Man....

...... but he also had financial aspirations beyond his means & dreamed of owning a big house, holidays in the sun & owning the *ultimate* status symbol........ a top-of-the-range Ferrari convertible. Not being criminally minded, he decided to ask the lord to make his dreams come true by goi...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

A store in which to to buy a husband

In this country, women run everything, which means that men, especially good men are a luxury

As such, there is a store that sells them. It's policies are straightforward

1. The store has 5 floors, each of which you may shop at your leisure. But you may only bring the husband ticket ...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

My cousin is a super hairy dude,

We used to nickname him Cousin "It" affectionately.

I remember chatting to him in our freshmen year trying to figure out what our dreams and aspirations were. Cousin It was a weird dude, he didn't really fit in most circles! He was always super quiet and didn't stand out much.
He was hell...

The Bee Joke

Once, there was a bee who lived in a very complex bee hive. All the bees residing in this hive lived very happily with their own tasks and aspirations. However, this particular bee, named Bart, was quite special. He was an incredibly intelligent bee who matured and learned far faster than his bee pe...

Old School Pirate Crime

Captain Normal Beard the up-and-coming pirate captain and his first mate Clumsy Edward were in desperate need of ink in order to make the numerous treasure maps they were sure create during all of their treasure-filled journeys. More than anything they needed red ink for the illustrious X's that wil...

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