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Versa Jokes

King Arthur got cursed with a strange disease

... and only an old ugly witch can cure him. But the witch demanded a young handsome knight for husband, and Galahad took it for the team and married her. On the night of the wedding, the witch turned into a beautiful woman and offered Galahad the choice, she can be old and ugly during the day, and ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A blonde and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game.

The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap. Politely she declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun.
He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vise versa." ...

What do you call that weird sensation when you are suddenly teleported from North Pole to South Pole or vice versa?

Bi-polar disorder.

My dad wore my mom's clothes and vice-versa. Really didn't want to see them like that.

To me, they were trans-parent

After going to the casino every weekend for years, I finally won big. A brand new Nissan.

I call it my Vice Versa.

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I snatch kisses and....

Vice versa

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

American writer Dorothy Parker was once asked "Why don't you go to church on sunday?"

She replied: "I'm too fucking busy and vice versa."

I discovered that my socks exhibit quantum entanglement.

As soon as I put on my left sock, the other sock immediately becomes the right sock, and vice versa, regardless of the distance between them.

What’s the difference between a French university student and a Russian one?

The French student is well shaved and slightly drunk; the Russian one is vice versa

I like to use phrases wrong sometimes

And vice versa

I'd like to get the rights to show Miami Vice backwards

I'd call it Miami Vice Versa

The traveling salesman's toast

To all the kisses I've snatched ...


and vice versa.

Wife or Girlfriend

A physicist, a mathematician and a computer scientist discuss what is better: a wife or a girlfriend. The physicist: "A girlfriend. You still have freedom to experiment." The mathematician: "A wife. You have security." The computer scientist: "Both. When I'm not with my wife, she thinks I'm with my ...

I said this when I was 6, and everyone laughed

Two twins came to our house one day, and I kept calling them the wrong names (they were their names, but I said Harry to Thomas and vice-versa)

My dad came to me and said 'can't tell them apart, can ya?'

'No dad, I can't tell 'em together!'

(Waits for downvotes)

Edit: fir...

What's the difference between a useless golfer and a useless skydiver?

The home golfer goes WHACK! "Oh no!" Whereas with the skydiver it's vice versa

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A couple arrived at town hall seconds before closing time, and caught a judge just as he was about to leave, and asked him to marry them.

He asked if they had a license and, when they didn’t, sent them off to get one.
They caught the town clerk just as he was locking up, and got the license from him.
When they got back to the judge, he pointed out they had filled the names in backwards — his where hers belonged and vice versa....

The Biology Exam.

Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term exam. The last question was, 'Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk'.

The question was worth 70 points or none at all. One student, in particular, was hard put to think of seven advantages.

However, he wrote:

1) I...

I'm really bad at understanding some common phrases

and vice versa.

Einstein and his chauffeur

When Einstein was still teaching as a professor, he had a chauffeur to drive him to his lectures and when Einstein was lecturing the chauffeur was listening for the back seats. After years chauffeur said to Einstein one day: "Your lectures are practically a joke... even I could give these lectures!"...

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You have one wish . . .

A woman found a magic bottle, rubbed it and out popped a genie. The amazed woman asked if she got three wishes. The genie said, “Nope, sorry, three-wish genies are a storybook myth. I’m a one-wish genie. So, what will it be?”

The woman did not hesitate. She said, “I want peace in the Middle E...

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