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Unconventional Jokes

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A distraught husband begs a doctor to help save his comatose wife.

The doctor says there's not much hope, but there's one slightly unconventional thing left to try.

"Okay! What's that?" the husband says.

"Go into her room and have oral sex with her. It's her only hope."

The husband goes into his wife's hospital room and comes running out three ...

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I have invented a new method for distilling alcohol in your rectum.

It's a little unconventional butt still, it works!

An old lady is riding the bus...

... when a haggard young mother with a screaming baby gets on. The mother sits across from the old lady, who watches her try everything to calm the child: burps her, rocks her, tries to feed her. Nothing works. The baby continues to scream its head off. Other passengers shoot the mother annoyed look...

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My wife is in a coma

So my wife was in a coma for months with no end in sight. I’m talking about alternatives with the doctor and he says there is one unconventional method that I’ve seen work. So I said I’d try anything. He said you have to perform oral sex on her. It could jolt the system.

I said by god. Well…...

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My wife went into a coma recently and the doctor said it doesn't look like we have many options.

After a month in a coma, my wife's doctor comes to me and says that there's a way to awake her from this coma but it's rather unconventional.

I asked the Dr what needed to happen and he tells me that the only way to wake her is by oral sex.

After about 5 minutes I come out of room conf...

The unusual camel

A man is walking through the desert. He's been lost for a while and he's kinda losing hope.

Behind a sand dune he sees what looks like a camel rental shop. Clearly a mirage.. or is it?

It doesn't disappear as he gets closer so he enters the main tent and is greeted by the owner.
...

They've just announced the birth of the royal baby and the name is 'yet to be decided'.

Unconventional and certainly the most original royal name yet.

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A woman hires an agent to kill her husband.

She sets it up so she can watch it from a building overlooking their apartment.

Her husband is showering as the agent arrives. She watches as the agent sneaks up on him without being heard. He whips off his overcoat, throws open the shower door and humps the husband to death.

The wife ...

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A man's wife had been in a coma in hospital for some time

As part of her continued care, her sheets were changed often and she was given sponge baths by a nurse.

During one of the sponge baths, the nurse noticed the wife reacted slightly when her private parts were washed.

The nurse spoke to the husband and explained that she had an unconvent...

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An elderly couple...

An elderly couple who have been together for years are struggling with their sex life. They’ve tried just about everything, but the passion has just died out. Eventually they decide to seek the advice of a less conventional doctor. They explain the problem - the husband says ‘No matter what I do, I ...

Once, many many years ago, there was a fad among fast food restaurants

to put historical, sometimes military or industrial items in their front yards as a kind of attraction/plaything; an old howitzer or maybe even a train caboose that kids could inspect or climb on. Sometimes these unlikely things would be decorated with the characters or dishes of the food chain. For...

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A businessman goes to a brothel...

He asks the madam for an unconventional experience as he frequently uses prostitutes, and the whole process has become stale.

Twelve women come out, and the madam walks down the line explaining the fetishes they cater to. After each one, the businessman becomes increasingly annoyed, as there...

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Weight loss program

An overweight guy is begging his doctor to help him lose weight. After some discussion, the doctor understands how desperate he is, so he offers to tell him about an unconventional technique.

"Anything, Doc! I'll do anything!"

"Well, the human body can absorb enough nutrition from the ...

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A woman has just lost a bunch of weight through diet pills and is at the department store buying new clothes.

A woman has just lost a bunch of weight through diet pills and is at the department store buying new clothes. As she's trying on clothes, she proudly announces to the person at the fitting room "I'm buying new dresses because I just lost a bunch of weight, guess how much I weigh now!" The employee ...

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