UPJOKE
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A testicle torturer comes home after a long day at work

"Ah, time to hit the sack"

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There's a room with a zoophile, a torturer, a pyromaniacal, an assasin and a sadomasochist

Zoophile: What if we fuck a cat?

Torturer: Yeah and then we torture it!

Pyromaniacal: And then burn it!

Assasin: Aaa aand kill it!




Masochist: ... Meow?

Torture

The Gestapo bring in their best torturer, to break three important prisoners who won't spill the beans.

The torturer breaks the first guy in a couple of days.

The second one is harder to break, so the torturer watches him at night, to see what he's doing in his cell. He discovers tha...

If this isn't in a movie in the next two years then this year has been a waste!

Setting: Our hero, tied to a chair in a laboratory.
Evil torturer: "So you won't talk, eh?"
Our hero: "You will never make me talk."
ET: "Even if I force you to wear this?" (Whips around. Our hero sees he has a face mask in his hand.)
OH: "No not that! Anything but that. I will tell all....

So, here's a story...

Once upon a time, there was a king.

The king ruled over a small kingdom he had inherited from his father.
The king was not a particularly bad ruler, considering.
However, one of the dukedoms his late father had conquered, started to plot against him, in order to liberate themselves from...

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The Bravest Football Fan

Three football fans, an Arsenal fan, a Chelsea fan, and a Manchester United fan, are caught gambling in a country in which gambling is illegal. They are brought before a judge and sentenced to be whipped 50 times each. Right before the judge releases the men, he tells them they each can have one req...

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