Tide Jokes - 33 Hilarious Tide Jokes

It's easy to convince ladies not to eat tide pods.

But it's harder to deter gents.

I'll let myself out.

Tide has some serious ad time during the superbowl this year

Must be able to afford it after cornering the teenage snack food market

People who eat Tide Pods are idiots.

The Costco brand pods are half the price. Just saying.

Personally, i think that Tide pods are even better than advertised.

I mean, anything that can clean your clothes and the gene pool in the same product...

What's the difference between Tide Pods and McDonald's?

One is full of dangerous chemicals that people keep eating for some reason, and the other gets your clothes clean.

I used to be addicted to Tide Pods...

But I’m clean now.

What do Tide Pods taste like?

Natural Selection.

Letter to Tide from beloved consumer

Dear Tide

I am writing to say what an excellent product you have!
One evening about a month ago, while at home, I spilled some red wine on my new white shirt. My wife started to berate me about my clumsiness and how expensive the shirt was. That I was stupid, couldn't even hold a glass rig...

Why did Santa Claus wash his clothes in Tide?

It was too cold out Tide.

What if tide pods..

Are just cleaning up people who should have been stains in the first place?

Tide announced the new motto for their pods line.

Cleaning the gene pool since 2017.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man with no arms and no legs is sunbathing on the beach

A beautiful woman walks over to him and says “awww you poor thing! I bet you’ve never been hugged before have you?”

He replies: “well, no actually I haven’t!”

She leans over and gives him a big hug.

“I bet you’ve never been kissed before either, have you?” she asks.

Once ...

Are you a tide pod?

Because you’re lookin’ like a snack but you’re really just toxic to everyone.

The tide will come in!

It did shore enough!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy with no arms and no legs is lying on a beach... (Warning: dark humor)

Then this beautiful, voluptuous blonde comes walking by, sees the crippled guy and starts pitying him. So she walks up to him and asks him: “Would you like a kiss?”

The guy looks up and says a bit hesitantly “Um… yes!”

So the woman bends down and the two of them make out for a long whi...

Why was the tide high?

Too much seaweed

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man with no arms and legs was sun baking on the beach.

A gorgeous blonde was walking past him, stopped for a second with a tang of pity in her eyes.

“Have you ever had a hug?” She asked.
“No.”
So with an “aww”, she gave him a big hug.

Two minutes later, another beautiful woman was walking past the man.

“Aw look at you honey. ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Don't Worry. The Tides Will Take Care of It.

Upon learning that the captain of the freighter that blocked the Suez Canal was ambivalent about the mess he created, the ship has been re-christened as the *No Fucks Ever Given.*

Why did the Alabama girl take the tide pod challenge?

To wash her family's extra large load.

Tide is fully embracing their new consumers with their new Tide Pod containers...

They just changed their “active ingredients” to “nutrition facts”.

What do you call a Tide Pod that prevents war?

A nuclear detergent

Learned today what causes high tides.

Sea weed.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why aren't we using Tide to prevent sexual harassment?

After all, it deters gents.

Last year, kids were eating tide pods. This year, they're getting vaccines and picking up trash.

Seems that eating tide pods makes you smart!

Why don't we see kids doing the Tide pod challenge anymore?

They cleaned themselves up

Trump brings back the Tide Pods challenge to fight against the Coronavirus

What? It's a disinfectant...

Now that the tide pod fad is dying down

lets move onto the cotton candy in the attic.

There is an upside to eating Tide Pods....

It takes the skid marks out of your underwear.

What do Prince Andrew and Tide Pods have in common?

They should always kept away from children

Why does the moon raise and lower the tides over and over again?

It has to make shore

There are flat earthers, there are tide pod eaters,

And there are people who want the first two to be the same.

Was this whole Superbowl a Tide ad?

I've seen stranger things.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three beautiful young girls are walking along the beach when they come across a man sunbathing.

He has no arms or legs. The first girl goes up to him and says, "Have you ever been hugged?"
The man shakes his head, so she bends down and gives him a big hug.

The second girl asks him if he has ever been kissed. Again he shakes his head so she bends down and gives him a long lingering k...

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