The troubles of foreigners in Canada

A patron in a Montreal restaurant turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded.

"This is an outrage," he complained. "The faucet marked 'C' gave me boiling water."

"But, Monsieur, 'C' stands for chaud – French for hot. You should know that if you live in Montreal."

"Wait a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man was walking down the street at night in Belfast, during the Troubles

While he's walking along, a masked gunman leaps out behind him, knocks him to the ground, and sticks a pistol in his face.

"What religion are you?" the gunman demands.

The man on the ground thinks fast- if he guesses Catholic or Protestant and gets it wrong, he's dead.

So he sho...

A psychologist tells the troubled man:

tell me about your childhood.
man: it was a horrible time doc, I used to have a twin and everyone accused me for all the troubles he made.
psychologist: what did you do about it?
man: i had my revenge last week..
psychologist: how?
man: I died and they buried him instead.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man, walking the High Street in Belfast at the height of the Troubles

Is accosted by a hand out of the side of his vision and pulled into an alleyway. A voice in the darkness asks, 'Catholic or Protestant?' The man, thinking quickly, says, 'neither, I'm Jewish!' 'Well fuck, that makes me the luckiest Arab in Belfast.'

A man in his 80’s went to a doctor with his beautiful, breathtaking 25 year old lady.

Doctor helped the frail old man in his clinic: What can I do for you today, sir?

Old man said to the Dr: I married this beautiful angel 2 months ago, and she is pregnant with my baby. At this age, I forgot how to care for the mother, I want to seek your advice.

Doctor a little taken ...

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