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For the first time in history, a US president haven't grown old, gray haired and tired by the stressful tasks of his presidency ...

... Instead everyone else did.

Bomb diffusal tech on being asked how he deals with the stress of the job

“It’s not stressful, I’m either right or it’s suddenly not my problem.”

Parenting is stressful! Parenting is a sacrifice, it’s exhausting, it’s expensive and at times it feels thankless but….

Eventually you die! -Jim Gaffigan

A guy walks into a bar after a stressful day at work and gets a beer for himself

As he sits there, alone in the bar, he hears a high-pitched voice say, "That shirt looks great on you!”
The man looks around, doesn’t see anyone, and returns to his drink thinking nothing more of it. But then, a moment later, the voice returns, this time offering, “You seem like a really cool guy...

The Covid19 situation has been especially stressful for the Flat Earth Society.

They fear that the social distancing measures could push people over the edge.

Half an year ago, a middle-aged man, walking home after a long and stressful day of work, found an old, crusty lamp in an abandoned alley.

"What harm could it do," he said out loud, and gave it a rub.

A genie emerged, exclaiming, “All behold, I, the most powerful genie!! My might is unparalleled, my power is incomprehensible, and I shall grant you 3 wishes for freeing me from my prison...”

"I am a simple man with a simpl...

Becoming a dad is stressful.

One day a man walked into a bar;
Bartender: "hello mate, what can I get you? You look quite tense!"
Man: "beer please, my wife is giving birth, she's had one but the doctors say there's more on the way and to keep myself occupied!"

An hour passes so the man uses the public phone in the ...

Ruth, a young blonde woman, was driving her Ferrari waaay over the speed limit,

…so she gets pulled over be the police. The police woman, who also turns out to be a young blonde, walks over to the Ferrari and signals Ruth to roll down her window. With the window open, our blonde police officer demands to see Ruth’s drivers license and registration. After finding the registratio...

Life on Earth is pretty stressful.

We are all under a lot of pressure atm.

What does a webpage do after a stressful day?

Refresh

This pandemic has been particularly stressful for flat earthers..

A lot of them are worried it's going to push people over the edge

Working at the unemployment office is extremely stressful

Even when you get fired you still have to come into work the next day.

2 people are talking after something stressful happens...

Guy 1: "Describe how you are feeling in 1 word."

Guy 2: "Good."

Guy 1: "Describe how you are feeling in 2 words."

Guy 2: "Not good."

After a stressful day, one man comes home and sits in his backyard, drinking a beer.

As he's getting up to get a snack, he stops and asks, "Jesus, what is the
meaning of life?"

To which Jesus replies, "You slave in the sun to support the ones you love.
You make money so you can buy things for your family to keep them happy."

The man asks, "Jesus, why is life so h...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Having sex whilst camping is stressful

It's fuckingintents

I love to pamper my girlfriend after she's had a stressful day at work.

I get her to text me when she's leaving so I can get the hot tap running, swirl around the foam and bubbles and time everything perfectly so that, the moment she walks through the door, the dishes are piled up and waiting for her.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My therapist says my job is too stressful and driven by competition, so she recommended meditation.

I think I'm a natural talent. I finished my first 5 minute meditation in under 2 minutes 49 seconds.

Copy-editing is a very stressful line of work

Every time one of us misses a period, we get really nervous.

I got home after a stressful and demotivating day to find my wife moving my whisky collection up to a high shelf.

I can always rely on her to lift my spirits.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was just offered a stressful job being a tester for super strength Viagra.

I’m thinking of taking it. How hard can it be?

Being A Valkyrie would be stressful as all hell:

Everyone would be dying to meet you

Being the President is seriously stressful.

Kennedy lost his mind!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My daughter just got a job at mcdonalds

So my daughter got home from work and was in tears, she said it was so stressful and a customer was mean to her today.

She said he yelled at her and was so angry, she's never seen someone so furious before.

Now I'm a grown man so I think it can be a good thing if the world chews on you...

I always find New Year's Eve stressful.

I've been diagnosed with old langxiety.

Camping as a couple is stressful...

...it's two in tents.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Doggy

A man walks into a bar looking to unwind after a stressful week. He orders his favorite drink and takes a look around. On one of the shelves behind the bartender is a huge glass jar full of hundreds of hundred dollar bills. Noticing the large amount of money, the man is intrigued.

"What's up...

Levels of stress.

1) You pick up a hitchhiker, A beautiful young girl. Suddenly she faints inside your car. You take her to the hospital.

-Stressful

2) But hospital says she is pregnant and you are going to be a father. You swiftly say that you are not the father, but the girl says you are!!

-Ver...

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